In the Name of Allah, Most Merciful, Most Compassionate
Sayyida A’isha (Allah be pleased with her) narrates that the Messenger of Allah (Allah bless him and grant him peace) said: “The most blessed marriage (nikah) is the one with the least expenses.” (al-Bayhaqi in his Shu’ab al-Iman & Mishkat al-Masabih).
The marriage feast (walimah) is a Sunnah of our beloved Messenger of Allah (Allah bless him and grant him peace). It is an outward expression of gratitude and pleasure and a great means of publicizing the marriage, which has been greatly encouraged.
The simpler the walimah and the marriage ceremony as a whole are kept, the better it will be. Allah has put barakah in simplicity, but nowadays it is pretty common that people spend many months or years to plan a wedding and spend thousands upon thousands for the ceremony, a sum which can be used for other indispensable needs of the Muslims. And if the intention behind spending such an amount is to show-off, then this will be regarded a grave sin.
وَءَاتِ ذَا ٱلْقُرْبَىٰ حَقَّهُۥ وَٱلْمِسْكِينَ وَٱبْنَ ٱلسَّبِيلِ وَلَا تُبَذِّرْ تَبْذِيرًا ﴿٢٦﴾ إِنَّ ٱلْمُبَذِّرِينَ كَانُوٓا۟ إِخْوَٰنَ ٱلشَّيَـٰطِينِ ۖ وَكَانَ ٱلشَّيْطَـٰنُ لِرَبِّهِۦ كَفُورًۭا ﴿٢٧[Qur'an, Al-Isra' 17:26-27]
And give the relative his right, and [also] the poor and the traveler, and do not spend wastefully. (26) Indeed, the wasteful are brothers of the devils, and ever has Satan been to his Lord ungrateful. (27)
It is not wajib to make walimah inviting hundreds or thousands of people and keeping it in a hall. Invite a few needy people and feed them, the sunnah of walimah will be achieved.
Sayyiduna Abu Hurayra (Allah be pleased with him) states: “The worst food is that of a wedding banquet (walima) to which only the rich are invited whilst the poor are not invited. And he who refuses an invitation (to a banquet) disobeys Allah and His Messenger (Allah bless him & give him peace).” (Bukhari)
Feed the walimah guests in your house, you won't need to hire a hall for which you have to pay hundreds. Rather save all this money and give it to the newly-wed or keep it for yourself and use it in a good cause. Remember, even if thousands of people will attend the wedding or walimah, they will never be satisfied, they will have unending complaints, e.g. the food was too salty or too oily or the meat was not done properly or it was too strong, or the food was tasteless or burnt etc. etc. Therefore leave all this wastage and work with simplicity.
A Sahābi got married in Medina and he did not even invite Rasulullah to a walima feast. When Rasulullah (Allah bless him and grant him peace) found out about this Sahābi's marriage, he did not show displeasure to this Sahābi that why why did he not invite him. Nowadays the family fights if they are not invited and say they will not invite to their functions and will not attend any other gathering in future.
Sayyiduna Anas ibn Malik (Allah be pleased with him) narrates that the Messenger of Allah (Allah bless him and grant him peace) saw a yellow mark on Abdur-Rahman ibn Awf (Allah be pleased with) and said: “What’s this?” He replied: “I have married a woman with the dowry being gold to the weight of a date-stone.” The Messenger of Allah (Allah bless him & give him peace) said: “May Allah bless you (in your marriage), perform a walimah, even if it is only with a goat.” (Bukhari)
The idea here is to feed people with sincerity and simplicity. If one feeds people with the simplest of meals but it is from the heart, that is far better (and the food is also more enjoyable) than feeding them quality food, where the intention is not so sincere.
The Messenger of Allah (Allah bless him and grant him peace) himself provided a walimah after many of his marriages. He provided meat and bread on the occasion of his marriage with Zaynab bint Jahsh (Allah be pleased with her), Hays (a type of sweat-dish cooked with dates, cheese & butter) on the occasion of his marriage with Safiyyah (Allah be pleased with her) and barley on another occasion. (Bukhari & Muslim]
When Faatimah (may Allah be pleased with her) reached the age of fifteen, proposals for her marriage began to come from high and responsible families. But the Prophet (Allah bless him and grant him peace) remained unresponsive.
Faatimah (may Allah be pleased with her) is the youngest daughter of our beloved Prophet (Allah bless him and grant him peace). Out of all the children, she was the most beloved to him. He said, 'The Queen of the ladies in Jannat is Faatimah.' He also said, 'Faatimah is part of my body. Whoever grieves her, grieves me.'
Ali (may Allah be pleased with him), who was 21 at the time, says: It occurred to me that I should go and make a formal proposal, but then I thought, 'How could this be accomplished, for I possess nothing.' At last, encouraged by the Prophet's kindness, I went to him and expressed my intention to marry Faatimah. The Prophet (Allah bless him and grant him peace) was extremely pleased and asked, 'Ali, Do you possess anything to give her in Mahr (dowry)?' I replied, 'Apart from a horse and an armour I possess nothing.'
The Prophet (Allah bless him and grant him peace) said, 'A soldier must, of course, have his horse. Go and sell away your armour.'
So, Ali (may Allah be please with him) went and sold his armor to Uthmaan (may Allah be pleased with him) for 480 Dirhams and presented it to Rasulullah (Allah bless him and grant him peace). Bilaal (may Allah be pleased with him) was ordered by the Prophet (Allah bless him and grant him peace) to bring some perfume and a few other things and Anas (may Allah be pleased with him) was sent to call Abu Bakr, Uthmaan, Talhah, Zubayr with some companions from the Ansaar (may Allah be pleased with them).
When these men arrived and had taken their seats, the Prophet (Allah bless him and grant him peace) recited the Khutbah (sermon) of Nikaah and gave Faatimah (may Allah be pleased with her) in marriage to Ali (may Allah be pleased with him). He announced, 'Bear you all witness that I have given my daughter Faatimah in marriage to Ali for 400 Mithqaal of silver and Ali has accepted.' He then raised his head and made Dua saying, 'O Allah, create love and harmony between these two. Bless them and bestow upon them good children.' after the Nikaah, dates were distributed.
The Prophet (Allah bless him and grant him peace) gave his beloved daughter a silver bracelet, two Yemeni sheets, four mattresses, one blanket, one pillow, one cup, one hand-grinding mill, one bedstead, a small water skin and a leather pitcher.
In this simple fashion, the wedding of the daughter of the leader of the worlds was solemnized. In following this Sunnah method, a wedding becomes very simple and easy to fulfill and without the unnecessary stress which accompanied big weddings.
May Allah enable us to follow the footsteps of the His beloved Messenger (Allah bless him and grant him peace) and protect us from wastefulness.
Allahumma salli 'ala Muhammad wa 'ala aalihi wa sahbihi wassallam.
And Allah knows best.
Wassalaam
Video Mufti Menk's warning against unislamic wedding practices
No comments:
Post a Comment