It Is Not All Rights

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم
In the Name of Allah, Most Merciful, Most Compassionate

Assalaamu alaykum

Dear Friends

I pray that you are well.

The man who knows that he has the upper right upon his spouse, know that your upper right is organized through the Shari'ah and you have to follow.

We all know that there are rights of the husband and there are rights of the wife. That is the law from our Creator. Each can demand their rights but we cannot build relationships based on rights and obligations. The law is like a body. It has a spirit (ruh) to give it life. Nothing can be solved by rights and obligations. We have to understand the spirit of the relationship between a man and a woman and we have to understand that Allah has made oppression haram.

Allah has made man as the leader for his family and with that comes great responsibility towards his family. If the man does his responsibility and succeeded, he will lead his family to Jannah to be with Allah. This is the spirit of the law that made man in charge of women [الرِّجَالُ قَوَّامُونَ عَلَى النِّسَاءِ Qur'an An-Nisa 4:34] and the commonly quoted hadith of the Prophet, Allah bless him and grant him peace, who said: "It is not right for any human being to prostrate to another; if it were right for one human being to prostrate to another, I would have commanded women to prostrate to their husbands because of the great rights that they have over them..."

This law is a message to men before women. But many men used this as evidence that they can treat their womenfolk like slaves. This is a clear oppression. Men have to follow the Shari'ah and apply the Shari'ah. If he misused his rights, it means he is disobeying his Creator.

If you want to live a life of this religion, it is not enough to know the rules of the Shari'ah, you have to understand the spirit of the law. The man who doesn't understand the spirit of the law that gives him the upper right is like a body without spirit --a corpse. By the same token the woman who understands the spirit of the law but does not give the rights given to her husband, she cannot do that either. Can anyone live with a spirit and no body? Can anyone live with a dead body, a body without a spirit?

May Allah make us obedient to Him and help us in our affairs. Ameen.

Please don't forget us in your night prayers. Jazakallahu khairan.

And Allah knows best.

Wassalaam