When you build good character you build the foundation that anchors you in trials, fuels you towards your goals and dreams, and frames how you perceive others and are perceived by them. In short, it is the most important quality you have for success in this world and the next.
Mus'ab bin Sa'd narrated from his father that a man said:
"O Messenger of Allah! Which of the people is tried most severely?"
He said:
"The Prophets, then those nearest to them, then those nearest to them. A man is tried according to his religion; if he is firm in his religion, then his trials are more severe, and if he is frail in his religion, then he is tried according to the strength of his religion. The servant shall continue to be tried until he is left walking upon the earth without any sins." (Tirmidhi)
When a person’s religion is strong, the tests get harder, but the reward is that you may be walking around completely sinless. You need to patience to pass the trials.
Positive traits like patience, caring, loving, gentleness, and self-control have to be taught and learn. It is no wonder that the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam said, “I was only sent to perfect good character.”
Most people, children and adults the like, have a hard time exercising patience from time to time. It can be really hard. But learning to do so is important to a person’s overall character, and therefore worth reaching for. We have to remember that everyone from the generation of the companions to ours has been able to grow into better versions of themselves. So we too can change.
In a world where instant gratification is everywhere, we may need to purposefully delay some things for no other reason but to teach ourselves and our children patience.
One area where our culture has become increasingly impatient is with consumer habits. Train yourself and teach your children to manage buying things and to wait until you can truly afford an item before making a purchase. Resist the urge to borrow money or buy something on credit.
Good charcater is not formed within a week or two. Protracted and patient effort is needed to develop good character.
May Allah grant us patience. Aameen.