Vulgarity

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم
In the Name of Allah, Most Merciful, Most Compassionate
Assalaamu alaykum

Dear Friends

I pray that you are well.

While I was walking the other day, an Arab boy, who appeared to be around 8 or 9 years old, uttered some words which did not sound Arabic to me but I could not make up the whole words. I looked at him and he ran away while uttering those words again a few times loudly. And they were, in fact, some vulgar words in English. I was shocked and wondered where could he have picked up those words.

Vulgarity involves words or behavior that offends good taste, usually involving slang for body functions or body parts. It occurs most to words of sexual intercourse and relieving oneself. Such language was once reserved for private conversations and disreputable establishments, but today it is becoming acceptable in the public arena. Words that were once taboo now are common in the news or even in normal conversation. Young people are not embarrassed because they grew up hearing it. So, while we can blame the media, TV, music, and the Hollywood for the prevalence of vulgarity in our society, experts contend the behavior of family members and friends is more to blame for the escalation of indecency and vulgarity.

The Prophet, Allah bless him and grant him peace, said,

“The believer is not an attacker [of people’s honor] (ta’’an), a curser, a speaker of vulgarity, or foul tongued.” (Tirmidhi)

Vulgarity is contrary to respectability and religiousness, and leads to putting oneself down and offending others. Proper manners entail that one refer to certain matters in non explicit terms, just as Allah referred to defecating as “coming from a low, concealed place,” and intercourse as “touching women.” Being explicit in such matters is the way of the religiously corrupt and they have extremely explicit words that they use that are repugnant to people of righteousness.

It is reported that the Prophet, Allah bless him and grant him peace, said:

“Paradise is forbidden for ever vulgar person to enter.”

May Allah protect us and our children from vulgarity and foul tongues. Ameen. Please don't forget us in your night prayers. JazakAllahu khairan.

And Allah knows best.
Wassalaam

A Pay Back

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم
In the Name of Allah, Most Merciful, Most Compassionate
Assalaamu alaykum

Dear Friends

I pray that you are well.

The right of parents is from among the greatest of right after Allah's right and that of His Messenger, Allah bless him and grant him peace. Parents are to be magnified and honored. The lack of magnification of one's parents translates to a lack of magnification of Allah for the one who magnifies Allah knows that Allah ordered him to magnify his parents and to show goodness to them.

Allah says,

وَوَصَّيْنَا ٱلْإِنسَٰنَ بِوَٰلِدَيْهِ حَمَلَتْهُ أُمُّهُۥ وَهْنًا عَلَىٰ وَهْنٍۢ وَفِصَٰلُهُۥ فِى عَامَيْنِ أَنِ ٱشْكُرْ لِى وَلِوَٰلِدَيْكَ إِلَىَّ ٱلْمَصِيرُ

And We have enjoined upon man [care] for his parents. His mother carried him, [increasing her] in weakness upon weakness, and his weaning is in two years. Be grateful to Me and to your parents; to Me is the [final] destination.
(Qur'an Luqman 31:14)

Allah says,

وَقَضَىٰ رَبُّكَ أَلَّا تَعۡبُدُوٓاْ إِلَّآ إِيَّاهُ وَبِٱلۡوَٲلِدَيۡنِ إِحۡسَـٰنًا‌ۚ إِمَّا يَبۡلُغَنَّ عِندَكَ ٱلۡڪِبَرَ أَحَدُهُمَآ أَوۡ كِلَاهُمَا فَلَا تَقُل لَّهُمَآ أُفٍّ۬ وَلَا تَنۡہَرۡهُمَا وَقُل لَّهُمَا قَوۡلاً۬ ڪَرِيمً۬ا (٢٣) وَٱخۡفِضۡ لَهُمَا جَنَاحَ ٱلذُّلِّ مِنَ ٱلرَّحۡمَةِ وَقُل رَّبِّ ٱرۡحَمۡهُمَا كَمَا رَبَّيَانِى صَغِيرً۬ا (٢٤

“And your Lord has decreed that you worship none but Him. And that you be dutiful to your parents. If one of them or both of them attain old age in your life, say not to them a word of disrespect, nor shout at them but address them in terms of honor. And lower unto them the wing of submission and humility through mercy, and say: "My Lord! Bestow on them Your Mercy as they did bring me up when I was young."
(Qur’an Al-Isra' 17:23-24)

Allah expedites the effects of kindness to parents and maintaining the bonds of kinship in this world before the next. So, no one who shows kindness to his parents except that Allah causes his lifespan to be prolonged and that his children show kindness to him when he is old.

A person used to be bold towards his father to the extent that when he became angry he would drag his father out of the house until he reached the stairs of the house. When the person reached old age, his sons were harsh to him. His sons used to carry him and dragged him, sometimes even past that point that he dragged his father. He said to his sons, "I used to drag your grandfather to here (the stairs), so stop." To that the sons replied, "That was the principal, we are giving you more."

This is now happening: A man has been ill for a few years, pretty much bed ridden. No more friends and his children had literally abandoned him. And the story was he treated his parents very badly when they were alive. His wife asked him to repent for his sins but he was heedless. May Allah guide and forgive him and forgive and have mercy on his parents. Ameen.

Mistreatment of parents is a loan just as kind treatment of parents is a loan. If one mistreats his parents, one will be repaid with mistreatment. So, honor and be kind to your parents if you want kindness be shown to you when you become old and feeble.

May Allah grant us and our children righteousness and bless us with our children's righteousness. Ameen. Please don't forget us in your night prayers. JazakAllahu khairan.

And Allah knows best.
Wassalaam

Honey, Am I Fat?

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم
In the Name of Allah, Most Merciful, Most Compassionate
Assalaamu alaykum

Dear Friends

I pray that you are well.

The health consequences of being overweight are many, and they are serious. Here is a partial list: hypertension, coronary artery disease, heart attacks, heart failure, type II diabetes, stroke, gallstones, gout, osteoarthritis, sleep apnea and some types of cancer (such as breast, prostate and colon).

We, with some exceptions, and as a society, are getting fat, and getting fat rapidly. Why now, and why so rapidly? There is no single answer to these questions.

According to one health expert, one conclusion with some certainty is that it isn't just our genes - it's what we're doing (or not doing). While it appears that, at least in some individuals, there is a genetic predisposition to obesity, genes clearly do not explain the rapid increase in obesity we are now seeing in our human population. After all, we have not had a sudden change in human genetic makeup over the last 20 years. The only logical explanation for this rapid fattening is in our lifestyles, and in what we are eating. And these two factors have changed recently.

We are less active than our parents once were. Internet, satellite TV, video games, automation, on line shopping, on line schools and learning, automation, are ever more prevalent, and unless we make a specific effort to exercise, it is all too easy for many of us to live completely sedentary lives. Apparently, we are. Also, there is no doubt that our diet isn't what it once was. We are eating more highly processed foods, and more fast foods, most of which are loaded with sugars, fats, and a new culprit - trans-fatty acids.

In any case, it is now impossible to avoid the conclusion that our lifestyle and our diet are unhealthful.

So what can we do with our extra weight? There are only two ways to reduce your weight: increase your activity, or decrease your caloric intake and remove certain foods and drinks from your diet. Either method implies a change in lifestyle; hence the difficulty most people have to lose weight and keep it off. But, unless a lot more people make these tough choices, there won't be enough healthy people around 20 years from now to care for the rest of the unhealthy people. Even now you hear more and more young people who suffer chronic back aches and much fatigue.

Most people who lose weight and keep it off find that they have to make a conscious commitment to a new lifestyle, one that includes more physical activity and eating healthy and balanced diet.

Remember, a Muslim eats to live, not vice versa. Heedlessly indulging in blessings, in complete oblivion to the purpose of one’s life and the wisdom in being given these blessings, turns blessings into a curse, and a door to Allah into a barrier from Him. Moderation is essential. So, we eat moderately. We don't eat everything we desire; this is wastefulness. We don't eat purely to satisfy our lust; this will lead to being denied wisdom. Full stomachs are not homes to wisdom.

The Prophet, Allah bless him and grant him peace, said,

“There is no container that the son of Adam fills worse than the stomach. Morsels that keep his back upright are sufficient for the son of Adam. If he must do more, then a third for his food, a third for his drink and a third for his breath.” (ibn Hibban)

The Prophet, Allah bless him and grant him peace, was once informed of a man who would eat a lot when he was a non Muslim and ate only a little after he converted, and he said,

“The believer eats from one intestine and the disbeliever eats from seven intestines.” (Bukhari)

Eating and drinking come under the following categories:
1. Obligatory -- This is the amount needed to ward off death and to enable one to offer the prayers standing [and fulfill one’s other obligations].
2. Recommended -- This is the amount that enables one to undertake recommended acts of worship, and teaching and studying sacred knowledge.
3. Permissible -- This is the eating up to one’s fill to increase one’s strength.
4. Disliked -- This is eating above the fill slightly to a degree that does not harm one.
5. Forbidden -- This is eating above one’s fill unless it is for the intention of strengthening oneself for a fast or so that one’s guest is not ashamed to eat or the like.

May Allah give us success. Ameen. Please don't forget us in your night prayers. JazakAllahu khairan.

And Allah knows best.
Wassalaam

In Health, In Sickness, Until Death

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم
In the Name of Allah, Most Merciful, Most Compassionate
Assalaamu alaykum

Dear Friends

I pray that you are well.

When we are healthy, we should be grateful to Allah because this is a great blessing from Him. We show our gratitude by using the blessing to serve Him and not use it to disobey Him or waste the blessing.

The Prophet, Allah bless him and grant him peace, said:

“There are two blessings that many people are cheated out of: health and free time." (Bukhari)

Ibn al-Jawzi said,

“A person might be healthy but not have free time due to being busy with his livelihood, and might be well off but not healthy; so when these two are combined and the person is overcome by laziness from performing acts of obedience, he is truly cheated.”

A healthy person should have a state of fear of Allah that dominates his state of hope in Allah as this pushes him to good actions and repentance. This fear must not, however, take him to the extent of despair of Allah’s mercy.

قَالَ وَمَن يَقْنَطُ مِن رَّحْمَةِ رَبِّهِ إِلَّا الضَّالُّونَ

“He said, 'And who despairs of the mercy of his Lord, excepting those that are astray?'” (Qur’an Al-Hijr 15:56)

A person who is afflicted with an illness should realize that this is a tremendous opportunity to draw close to Allah. So, he should be grateful for that and make the most of it.

The Prophet, Allah bless him and grant him peace, said:

“The people who were in well being in this life will wish on Judgment Day, when the people of tribulations are given their reward, that their skin would have been cut with blades.” (Tirmidhi)

He, Allah bless him and grant him peace, also said,

“No believer is afflicted with a thorn-prick or what is greater than that except that a higher degree is inscribed for him, or a sin removed from him” (Muslim)

The person should use the time in remembrance of Allah and seek to cure himself through supplication, prayer and remembering Allah; especially by reciting sura al-Fatiha and the last three surahs of the Qur’an.

The person should face the tribulation with a beautiful patience. This is by not complaining to visitors, missing prayers or having despair. He should repent sincerely from the sins he was committing before his sickness.

It is permissible to use medicine to treat oneself with the condition that one believes that the cure is only from Allah who has made the medicine an outer means to attain this, and if He wills he will cure without one taking medicine or not cure despite one taking medicine.

The Prophet, Allah bless him and grant him peace, said,

“Every ailment has a cure; if the cure meets the ailment he is cured with the leave of Allah.” (Muslim)

One may not take medicine that is unlawful such as wine or products from unslaughtered animals unless a Muslim doctor tells one that no other cure is available. **

We should remember death often.

The Prophet, Allah bless him and grant him peace, said:

“Remember often the terminator of pleasures.” (ibn Hibban)

The benefits of this include purification from sins, abstinence in this life, making great tribulations manageable, making small worldly means seem much, removal of worry over this life and disdaining vain pleasures.

It is not lawful for one to wish for death on account of pain or difficulty that one is in; because life is Allah’s will for one, and desiring it to leave is not be satisfied with His will.

The Prophet, Allah bless him and grant him peace, said,

“Let none of you wish for death due to a harm that has reached him. If he is compelled to do so then let him say, “O Allah, give me life so long as life is better for me, and take my soul in death when death is better for me.” (Bukhari)

One should take means that promote a healthy life, while believing that these means
cannot ward off the destiny of Allah. A long life full of service to Allah is of the greatest of ranks.

A man asked the Prophet, Allah bless him and grant him peace,

“O Messenger of Allah, which people are the best?” He replied, “He whose life is long and works good.” "Which of people are worse? He replied, "He whose life is long and works bad." (Tirmidhi)

A person should not be sick for two nights without having his will prepared. It should contain a clear statement of his debts and who they are owed to (to Allah such as missed prayers, fasts, zakat, hajj, expiations, as well as debts to people). A person is entitled to make a bequest of up to a third of his remaining wealth after debts have been paid, the rest must be divided according to the Islamic rules of inheritance laid out clearly in the Qur’an and books of sacred law.

Someone on his deathbed should have a good opinion of Allah. This is by having more hope than fear; having the belief that Allah will overlook one’s sins; not letting his deeds come to mind, neither the good nor the bad, as they distract from having a good opinion of Allah and true hope in His bounty.

The Prophet, Allah bless him and grant him peace, said, three days before he died,

“Let none of you die except having a good opinion of Allah Mighty and Majestic.” (Muslim)

The Prophet, Allah bless him and give him peace, said,

“Death is a gift for the believer.”

He should long for the meeting with Allah. The Prophet, Allah bless him and grant him peace, said,

“Whoever loves to meet Allah, Allah loves to meet him. Whoever dislikes to meet Allah, Allah dislikes to meet him.” Aisha (Allah be pleased with her) or one of his wives said, “But we dislike death,” he replied, “That’s is not the point; rather, the believer when death comes to him, he is given the great good news of Allah’s pleasure and generosity, and there is nothing more beloved to him that what is ahead of him, so he loves meeting Allah and Allah loves meeting him. The disbeliever when death comes to him is given the great news of Allah’s punishment and chastisement, and there is nothing more disliked to him that what is ahead of him so he dislikes meeting Allah, and Allah dislikes meeting him.” (Bukhari)

Don't let anything distract the dying person from remembrance of Allah. He should leave all thoughts and inclinations towards this life and other people, and free himself of his power and ability and relying solely on Allah’s generosity and protection. He should make sincere supplication for Allah to preserve his faith.

The Prophet, Allah bless him and grant him peace, was asked,

“What is the best of works?” He replied, “That one of you should die and his tongue is moist with the remembrance of Allah.”

He, Allah bless him and grant him peace, also said,

“Whoever’s last words are “La illaha illa Allah (There is no god but Allah),” will enter paradise.” (Abu Dawud)

One should not hate a painful death for oneself or anyone else, for Allah removes sins from a person through illness in his body, delay in provender, fear in life and severity at death.

Aisha, Allah be pleased with her, said,

“The Prophet, Allah bless him and grant him peace, died while he was between my chest and my throat [in my arms], and I do not dislike for anyone to have a severe death after the Prophet, Allah bless him and grant him peace, ever.” (Bukhari)

“[when he, Allah bless him and grant him peace, died] before him was a container of water, he placed his hands inside it and wiped his face and said, “There is no god but Allah; surely death has tremendous mind-numbing pain.” Then he raised his hand and started saying, “O Allah, in the highest company” until he died and his hand dropped.” (Bukhari)

May Allah make us die at the highest of iman (faith) and resurrect us with His beloved, sallallahu alayhi wassallam, and enter us into the highest Paradise with him. Ameen.

Please don't forget us in your night prayers. JazakAllahu khairan.

And Allah knows best.
Wassalaam
** Hanafi ruling

Smoking

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم
In the Name of Allah, Most Merciful, Most Compassionate
Assalaamu alaykum

Dear Friends

I pray that you are well.

Everybody knows that cigarette smoking is bad for you. But why do teenagers start smoking (this is the age when typically people start the habit, some even younger), and why smokers just don't quit?

A study shows that people who smoke can't quit because they are addicted to nicotine. Some didn't know that it is addictive. So, most of them think that they will smoke for a while and then stop. Teenagers start smoking in part because their elders smoke and in part because other teenagers smoke. The study further indicate that it seems highly likely that cigarette advertising––– which associates smoking with youth and music and joy and sex––– is an auxiliary factor, perhaps a quite potent one.

The U.S. Surgeon General's Office calls cigarette smoking to America's worst drug addiction problem. It involves addiction to the drug nicotine in tobacco and possible other tobacco substances.

However, the view that cigarette smoking is an addiction to the drug nicotine seems to fly in the face of common sense. Some people have quit smoking with relatively little difficulty. Some of us probably know quite a few individuals personally who have quit. So perhaps, the case for the addicting nature of cigarette smoking is being exaggerated.

Regardless, we are accountable to Allah for what we do with Allah's blessings, including our bodies, our money, and our environment.

Cleanliness and hygiene are emphasized to the extent that it has been considered a part of our Iman (Faith). It is known that smoker's mouth is unclean and foul smelling "like a cigarette ash-tray."

A smoker's body is polluted with smoke. So, the smoker should not pray until they have cleansed themselves.

Allah says,

يَا أَيُّهَا الَّذِينَ آمَنُوا لَا تَقْرَبُوا الصَّلَاةَ وَأَنتُمْ سُكَارَىٰ حَتَّىٰ تَعْلَمُوا مَا تَقُولُونَ وَلَا جُنُبًا إِلَّا عَابِرِي سَبِيلٍ حَتَّىٰ تَغْتَسِلُوا ۚ وَإِن كُنتُم مَّرْضَىٰ أَوْ عَلَىٰ سَفَرٍ أَوْ جَاءَ أَحَدٌ مِّنكُم مِّنَ الْغَائِطِ أَوْ لَامَسْتُمُ النِّسَاءَ فَلَمْ تَجِدُوا مَاءً فَتَيَمَّمُوا صَعِيدًا طَيِّبًا فَامْسَحُوا بِوُجُوهِكُمْ وَأَيْدِيكُمْ ۗ إِنَّ اللَّـهَ كَانَ عَفُوًّا غَفُورً‌ا

"O you who believe! Do not go near prayer when you are Intoxicated until you know (well) what you say, nor when you are under an obligation to perform a bath-- unless (you are) traveling on the road--until you have washed yourselves; and if you are sick, or on a journey, or one of you come from the privy or you have touched the women, and you cannot find water, betake yourselves to pure earth, then wipe your faces and your hands; surely Allah is Pardoning, Forgiving." (Qur'an An-Nisa 4:43)

The smell of cigarette smoke can be very offensive to non smokers, probably worse than the smell of garlic or onions.

The Prophet, Allah bless him and grant him peace, said,

"He who has eaten garlic or onion should keep away from us or our mosques." (Bukhari and Muslim).

Allah says:

يَٰٓأَيُّهَا ٱلَّذِينَ ءَامَنُوٓا۟ إِنَّمَا ٱلْخَمْرُ وَٱلْمَيْسِرُ وَٱلْأَنصَابُ وَٱلْأَزْلَٰمُ رِجْسٌۭ مِّنْ عَمَلِ ٱلشَّيْطَٰنِ فَٱجْتَنِبُوهُ لَعَلَّكُمْ تُفْلِحُونَ

O ye who believe! Intoxicants and gambling,(dedication of) stones, and (divination by) arrows, are an abomination,- of Satan's handwork: eschew such (abomination), that ye may prosper. (Qur'an Al-Ma'idah 5:90)

إِنَّمَا يُرِيدُ ٱلشَّيْطَٰنُ أَن يُوقِعَ بَيْنَكُمُ ٱلْعَدَٰوَةَ وَٱلْبَغْضَآءَ فِى ٱلْخَمْرِ وَٱلْمَيْسِرِ وَيَصُدَّكُمْ عَن ذِكْرِ ٱللَّهِ وَعَنِ ٱلصَّلَوٰةِ ۖ فَهَلْ أَنتُم مُّنتَهُونَ

Satan's plan is (but) to excite enmity and hatred between you, with intoxicants and gambling, and hinder you from the remembrance of God, and from prayer: will ye not then abstain? (Qur'an Al-Ma'idah 5:91)

The word intoxicant has three meanings:
(1) To induce, especially the effect of ingested alcohol.
(2) To stimulate or excite.
(3) To poison.

The latter two meanings are very valid and applicable to nicotine.

Medical investigations show that cigarette smoking is a major factor in the development of many cases of cancer, heart trouble, chronic lung and respiratory disease and other ailments. Cigarette smoking in pregnant women results in deleterious health effects on their newborn children.

وَأَنفِقُوا۟ فِى سَبِيلِ ٱللَّهِ وَلَا تُلْقُوا۟ بِأَيْدِيكُمْ إِلَى ٱلتَّهْلُكَةِ ۛ وَأَحْسِنُوٓا۟ ۛ إِنَّ ٱللَّهَ يُحِبُّ ٱلْمُحْسِنِي

"And spend of your substance in the cause of God, and make not your own hands contribute to (your) destruction[190]; but do good; for God loves those who do good." (Qur'an Al-Baqara 2:195)

It is scientifically proven that the exhaled smoke of the smoker is hazardous to non-smokers around him.

It is unlawful to harm another Muslim. The Prophet, Allah bless him and grant him peace, said:

Do not envy one another, and do not inflate prices for one another, and do not hate one another, and do not turn away from one another, and do not undercut one another in trade, but [rather] be Slaves of Allah and Brothers [amongst yourselves]. A Muslim is the brother of a Muslim : he does not oppress him, nor does he fail him, nor does he lie to him, nor does he hold him in contempt. Taqwaa (Piety) is right here [and he pointed to his chest three times]. It is evil enough for a man to hold his brother Muslim in contempt. The whole of a Muslim is inviolable for another Muslim : his blood, his property, and his honor. (Muslim)

The amount of money a smoker spends on cigarettes go up in smokes (not including the money spent on smoker's health care).

Allah says,

وَآتِ ذَا الْقُرْبَىٰ حَقَّهُ وَالْمِسْكِينَ وَابْنَ السَّبِيلِ وَلَا تُبَذِّرْ تَبْذِيرًا ﴿٢٦﴾ إِنَّ الْمُبَذِّرِينَ كَانُوا إِخْوَانَ الشَّيَاطِينِ ۖ وَكَانَ الشَّيْطَانُ لِرَبِّهِ كَفُورً‌ا ﴿٢٧

"And give the relative his right, and [also] the poor and the traveler, and do not spend wastefully. Indeed, the wasteful are brothers of the devils, and ever has Satan been to his Lord ungrateful." (Qur'an Al-Isra 17:26-27)

Whether smoking is haram or not, it is clear that smoking is a wasteful act.

إِنَّهُ لَا يُحِبُّ الْمُسْرِفِينَ

...Surely He (Allah) loves not the wasters. Qur'an Al-An'am 6:141

Anyone who smokes should resolve to quit entirely. And those who are thinking about picking up that habit, think again.

If you smoke and if you want to quit, you can quit inshaAllah. Nothing is difficult through Allah and nothing is easy through ourselves.

Allah says,

الَّذِينَ يَتَّبِعُونَ الرَّسُولَ النَّبِيَّ الْأُمِّيَّ الَّذِي يَجِدُونَهُ مَكْتُوبًا عِندَهُمْ فِي التَّوْرَاةِ وَالْإِنجِيلِ يَأْمُرُهُم بِالْمَعْرُوفِ وَيَنْهَاهُمْ عَنِ الْمُنكَرِ وَيُحِلُّ لَهُمُ الطَّيِّبَاتِ وَيُحَرِّمُ عَلَيْهِمُ الْخَبَائِثَ وَيَضَعُ عَنْهُمْ إِصْرَهُمْ وَالْأَغْلَالَ الَّتِي كَانَتْ عَلَيْهِمْ ۚ فَالَّذِينَ آمَنُوا بِهِ وَعَزَّرُوهُ وَنَصَرُوهُ وَاتَّبَعُوا النُّورَ‌ الَّذِي أُنزِلَ مَعَهُ ۙ أُولَـٰئِكَ هُمُ الْمُفْلِحُونَ

"Those who follow the Messenger, the unlettered Prophet, whom they find written in what they have of the Torah and the Gospel, who enjoins upon them what is right and forbids them what is wrong and makes lawful for them the good things and prohibits for them the evil and relieves them of their burden and the shackles which were upon them. So they who have believed in him, honored him, supported him and followed the light which was sent down with him - it is those who will be the successful." (Qur'an Al-'Araf 7:157)

May Allah give you tawfiq. Ameen. Please don't forget us in your night prayers. JazakAllahu khairan.

And Allah knows best.
Wassalaam

It Is The Sound Of Music

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم
In the Name of Allah, Most Merciful, Most Compassionate
Assalaamu alaykum

Dear Friends

I pray that you are well.

Death will come to each and everyone of us, unannounced. It may be while we are cooking, eating, swimming, jogging, sporting, driving, having fun with our children, talking, listening to something, watching something, sleeping, studying, praying, fasting, or reciting the Qur'an, only Allah knows. What do you think will roll easily out of your tongue during that last moments? Is it going to be La ilaha illa Allah إله إلا الله‎,لا? Or some music lyrics or some cuss words?

This video is a tremendous one hour investment of your time. Please ask your children to listen with you. If you are too busy now, listen from the 48 minute mark for now, and get back to it later ASAP. SubhanAllah, it made me cry along.

We need our youth but many of them can't live without music. They can't hear you, let alone the adhan (call for prayer), when their ears are plugged with those ear buds! What do they learn from music and what will become of them without the love of Allah?

The heart which loves music has no room to love Allah. And this is what is happening to many of our youth today. They don't know their religion. They don't know their Creator. Music has wasted their time and they don't have time to learn about their Creator and to be productive member of the society for that matter.

Music is everywhere, even in Muslim countries, in Muslim media, in Muslim households, in Muslim automobiles. Music has become the staple. They are readily available. There are also these free music downloads which make it easy for our youth to get to them. And they listen to it day in and day out. It is no wonder our youth, even the semi practicing ones, know more about musicians, new albums, music lyrics, but don't know Allah and His Messenger, Allah bless him and grant him peace, and his companions, or how to recite al-Fatiha properly. We need to end the music in their lives. Start in your own home--delete all the music folders and break all those music CDs. May Allah help you and give you sabr. Ameen.

Music begins with the Shaytan and ends with the wrath of Allah. There is no doubt about this saying. Don't be fooled by those who said music is halal (lawful). Even if some music is permissible, it is a step towards haram (unlawful). Just watch your behavior when you listen to music or when you sing a song. At the very least, Allah is neither in your heart nor in your mind--so it takes you away from the remembrance of Allah. What if you die at that moment? What do you think would be your final words? La ilaha illa Allah إله إلا الله‎,لا or the music your are humming or some lyrics you have memorized?

Narrated Abu 'Amir or Abu Malik Al−Ash`ari: that he heard the Prophet, Allah bless him and grant him peace, saying,

"From among my followers there will be some people who will consider illegal sexual intercourse, the wearing of silk, the drinking of alcoholic drinks and the use of musical instruments, as lawful. And there will be some people who will stay near the side of a mountain and in the evening their shepherd will come to them with their sheep and ask them for something, but they will say to him, 'Return to us tomorrow.' Allah will destroy them during the night and will let the mountain fall on them, and He will transform the rest of them into monkeys and pigs and they will remain so till the Day of Resurrection." (Bukhari)

May Allah forgive us, give us an excellent ending and make our final words as La ilaha illa Allah (there is not god except Allah). Ameen. Please don't forget us in your night prayers. JazakAllahu khairan.

And Allah knows best.
Wassalaam

Women, You're On Your Own

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم
In the Name of Allah, Most Merciful, Most Compassionate
Assalaamu alaykum

Dear Friends

I pray that you are well.

If we rely on people, we will never get anywhere. We will be disappointed at one point or another because no one is perfect. Each and everyone of us have inadequacies and many flaws, some are worse than the person next to you. Some people may look like a butterfly, sweet and kind, gentle and chivalrous, and everybody loves them and can't have enough of them, except his wife who would tell you how horrible her husband is and vice versa. Being a lawyer, spending most of my time, at one time, in Family courts, this is a matter no one can say it is a far fetched tale. Even some religious people are not free from this double image, but if they fear Allah, they work to correct themselves.

Women, you maybe on your own, but you are not alone. Rely on the True and Perfect One, Who neither changes nor sways by anything. Don't allow your heart to be connected to anything except Allah. Trust all your affairs with Allah alone while you do the best you can. Ask Allah alone to help you and believe that He will help you.

Remember the story of the people of the cave; the youths hid in the cave, but they trusted in Allah, and made over their whole case to Him in prayer. They apparently fell asleep (for 300 years, some add 9 more) and knew nothing of what was happening in the world outside. All along Allah protected them.

إِذْ أَوَى الْفِتْيَةُ إِلَى الْكَهْفِ فَقَالُوا رَبَّنَا آتِنَا مِن لَّدُنكَ رَحْمَةً وَهَيِّئْ لَنَا مِنْ أَمْرِنَا رَشَدًا

Behold, the youths took in the Cave: they said, "Our Lord! bestow on us Mercy from Thyself, and dispose of our affair for us in the right way!" (Qur'an al-Kahf 18:10)

Have certainty (yaqeen) that Allah will give you what is best for you, and be content with what Allah sends your way.

Prophet, Allah bless him and grant him peace, said:

Allah the Almighty said: I am as My servant thinks I am. I am with him when he makes mention of Me. If he makes mention of Me to himself, I make mention of him to Myself; and if he makes mention of Me in an assembly, I make mention of him in an assemble better than it. And if he draws near to Me an arm's length, I draw near to him a fathom's length. And if he comes to Me walking, I go to him at speed.
(Bukhari, Muslim, Tirmidhi and Ibn-Majah)

I thought this is an interesting read. When you go to Wal-Mart, show your support and sympathy towards those ladies serving you, especially the old ladies, who have to work outside of their homes. Where are all the men who are supposed to support them?

Supreme Court to Women of Wal-Mart: You're on Your Own

June 20, 2011

Today, a Supreme Court majority ruled against women by siding with the country's largest employment discriminator, saying Wal-Mart, essentially, is too big to sue. The brave women, led by Betty Dukes, who stood up to Wal-Mart at great personal sacrifice, are told simply they're on their own.

"With this decision, the Supreme Court has assisted Wal-Mart in its efforts to systematically dole out promotions and pay raises on the basis of sex. The law calls that illegal discrimination, but this Court has turned its back on the more than million women who only sought simple justice," said NOW President Terry O'Neill. "The women of Wal-Mart deserve respect and fair treatment, and we will continue to stand up for their rights."

In 2002, NOW declared Wal-Mart a "Merchant of Shame" as part of its Women-Friendly Workplace Campaign. NOW chapters have led countless community demonstrations at Wal-Mart stores around the country to educate shoppers about Wal-Mart's exploitation of its women employees.

Today, NOW demands an immediate legislative response to help the women of Wal-Mart. We call on Congress to pass the Paycheck Fairness Act, which would provide more effective remedies to victims of sex-based wage discrimination. This bill passed in the House in January 2009, but ultimately was defeated in the Senate.

"The gap between women's and men's pay is still sizeable, which is why it's so important to get this legislation passed," stated O'Neill. "We will continue supporting the efforts of Senators Mikulski, Cantwell, Gillibrand, Klobuchar, Stabenow and others to pass the Paycheck Fairness Act and hold accountable those who stand in the way of this sensible remedial bill."

A legislative remedy is only part of the solution, however. NOW also calls on Wal-Mart to end its unconscionable resistance to employees' efforts to form unions and bargain collectively over pay, benefits and other conditions of employment. Research demonstrates that unionized women workers earn better wages and have better benefits than their non-union counterparts. In fact, women in unions earn 11.2 percent more or $2.00 more per hour than non-union women workers. And the gender wage gap is smaller in unionized workplaces.

"The benefits of being unionized are significant," said O'Neill. "Women workers can gain a voice througha union that they could never have individually, ultimately making Wal-Mart a better place to work for everyone."
http://now.org/press/06-11/06-20.html

JEDDAH: Grand Mufti Sheikh Abdul Aziz Al-Asheikh has strongly warned against maltreating women in any form and said this is totally against Islam.

In his Friday sermon at Imam Turki bin Abdullah Mosque in Riyadh, the mufti said only bad people treat women badly.

"The psychological or physical abuse of wives, daughters and sisters is against the Islamic Shariah and the Sunnah of the Prophet Muhammad (pbuh)," he said.

Al-Asheikh warned husbands and fathers who take the salaries of their wives and daughters that they are committing anti-Islamic acts.

"The fathers who make it a condition to have their daughters' salaries before they give their consent for marriage are equally wrong. Husbands who force their working wives to share in home expenses are committing erroneous acts. Islam made it the responsibility of the man to spend on the house," he told the worshippers.

The mufti also said it is haram (forbidden in Islam) when husbands ask their wives who request divorce to return the dowry before they consent to divorce. He also said burdening women with bank loans and letting them suffer the payment of installments is equally haram.

The mufti said polygamy, which is allowed by Islam under the condition of being just and fair, is not a loose right. "The first wife should have all her rights," he said.

He also warned against relying on matchmakers who draw a bright picture of the groom who may turn out in the end to be an unethical and irresponsible man. "Matchmakers should convey a true picture of the groom and the bride," he said.

The mufti asked people to make the Prophet a role model in his treatment of women, citing a number of Hadiths that the Prophet never maltreated women.

"The Prophet was completely refined in the treatment of his wives, daughter and other Muslim women," he said.

The Prophet has said: "The best of you are the best to their wives; and I am the best to my wives."

The Ministry of Social Affairs has toll free telephone numbers in several cities and towns for women to report cases of violence against them.

By MUHAMMAD HUMAIDAN | ARAB NEWS
Published: Apr 8, 2011 19:05 Updated: Apr 8, 2011 20:41

May Allah rain His mercy upon all of us. Ameen. Please don't forget us in your night prayers. JazakAllahu khairan.

And Allah knows best.
Wassalaam

Signs Of The Scholars Of The Heareafter

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم
In the Name of Allah, Most Merciful, Most Compassionate
Assalaamu alaykum

Dear Friends

I pray that you are well.

Living in America back then was not easy to find learned person to teach Islam, at least they were not visible. So, we learned Islam mainly through getting together and read some Islamic books together, and whoever had some knowledge would impart it. Of course, this is not the way to learn Islam, but that was all we had. We looked forward to a rare Islamic convention coming to town or a rare event presenting some unknown Shaykh from out of state, at a distant, more active masjid or town.

Today, so much things have changed with the creation of the internet. You can find Islamic knowledge everywhere. They are many local Shaykhs who give lessons and many conventions where you can see and hear various Shaykhs giving their lectures. Some are vibrant and some are mellow. Some are down to earth and some would not even respond to your salaams (maybe they are too busy with fans that they could not hear your salaams or maybe they don't need your salaams).

You pick and choose who you want to listen to and who you would not want to ever listen to. Once I asked a Shaykh, where do I find a good scholar. The Shaykh did not give me a direct answer, but he said, send a lot of blessings on the Prophet, Allah bless him and grant him peace.

Like all humans, all scholars have faults. Some have more faults than others. So we take what is good and ignore what is bad. But we have to be careful of the so called scholars. They can be a huge distraction and time waster, for all they are good at is rowdy up the audience. These people cause problems for the Muslim ummah and they are more dangerous than anything else. Just because they have a title Shaykh or the like before their names or just because they have 10s of thousands fans, that doesn't mean you can take from them.

One who is a learned man of the Hereafter will receive salvation and gain nearness of Allah. There are many signs of the scholars of the Hereafter.

1. He does not seek the world by his learning. He considers the world as insignificant and the hereafter as great and ever lasting.

2. His words and actions are the same, rather he does not order an action to be done without first doing it himself.

3. The Prophet, Allah bless him and grant him peace, said, "Don't company every learned man. Be with the learned man who calls towards five matters towards faith from doubt, sincerity from show, modesty from pride, love from enmity, and asceticism from worldliness.

4. His mind would be directed towards such learning that will be useful for the next world and give encouragement to pious deeds. He will avoid those learning which will bring lesser benefit but much arguments.

5. He has no attraction for various kinds of foods and drinks, luxury in dresses, furniture and houses, but rather he adopts moderate course in all these things following the earlier sages and he is best satisfied with the least of everything.

6. He is a man who fears of Allah and to avoid all manner of risk.

7. He keeps himself distant from the ruling authorities and avoids their company, because this world is sweet, ever new and its bridle is in their hands. He who get closer to them is not free from their pleasures and harms. They are mostly unjust and do not obey the advice of the learned men.

8. He does not give fatwa in a hurry but tries to be relieved of it. When he is asked and if he knows he gives his opinion. When he has doubt, he says, "I don't know." He is careful not to commit himself but refer the matter to someone else who is more capable than him.

(The great Imam Malik, Allah be pleased with him, once was asked about 40 questions by someone who traveled from a far away land of Iraq to Madina to present these questions from his people, and he all he could say was "I don't know" for all of them except a few.")

9. His main object of anxiety is to learn sacred knowledge, observation of the heart, and knowledge of the paths of the hereafter, to travel thereon and to have abiding faith in finding self-mortification.

10. He is sincere and upright for making his faith firm and strong as firm faith is the root of religion.

11. Another sign of the learned man of the next world is that he becomes humble and adopts silence. The effect of the fear of Allah appears on his body, dress, character movements, speech and silence. His sight reminds one of Allah and his nature and character are proofs of his actions. His eye is a mirror of his mind. The signs of the learned man of the hereafter are recognized in his face, tranquility, modesty and freedom from pride and vanity. A sage said, "Allah has not given a man with a garment better than the garment of the fear of Allah. It is the garment of the Prophets, Siddiqs (the truthful) and the learned men". (From Ihaya ul Uloom)

May Allah guide us to the righteous scholars of this time and preserve them for the ummah. Ameen. Please don't forget us in your night prayers. JazakAllahu khairan.

And Allah knows best.
Wassalaam

Key To Felicity

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم
In the Name of Allah, Most Merciful, Most Compassionate
Assalaamu alaykum

Dear Friends

I pray that you are well.

The Prophet, Allah bless him and grant him peace, said: "Paradise is surrounded with hardships and hell is surrounded with desires." (Muslim)

We need patience to endure the hardships and matters we dislike, and we need patience to control our desires and avoid the temptations. There is never too much patience. Those who are patient, Allah reward them without measure. So, patience is key to felicity.

When the prayer adhan comes on especially during fajr, do you jump out of bed to take wudu' or you hide yourself under your covers? Yes, it is not easy to wake up for fajr especially when fajr is 3 o'clock in the morning and you didn't go to sleep until after midnight and you have to go to work in the morning. There are many people who are in similar circumstance but they wake up for fajr. Why? Because they have patience in this matter--patience in overcoming what they desire to do--in this case, sleep.

We should remember this saying a lot because it helps us to put everything in perspective. Will my action lead me to Paradise or Hell? Then, choose! Remember, nothing we do is without consequence in this life before the next.

فَمَن يَعْمَلْ مِثْقَالَ ذَرَّةٍ خَيْرًا يَرَهُ ﴿٧﴾ وَمَن يَعْمَلْ مِثْقَالَ ذَرَّةٍ شَرًّا

"So whoever does an atom's weight of good will see it, And whoever does an atom's weight of evil will see it"

(Qur'an Zalzala 99:1)

وَجَآءَ رَبُّكَ وَٱلۡمَلَكُ صَفًّ۬ا صَفًّ۬ا (٢٢) وَجِاْىٓءَ يَوۡمَٮِٕذِۭ بِجَهَنَّمَ‌ۚ يَوۡمَٮِٕذٍ۬ يَتَذَڪَّرُ ٱلۡإِنسَـٰنُ وَأَنَّىٰ لَهُ ٱلذِّكۡرَىٰ (٢٣) يَقُولُ يَـٰلَيۡتَنِى قَدَّمۡتُ لِحَيَاتِى (٢٤) فَيَوۡمَٮِٕذٍ۬ لَّا يُعَذِّبُ عَذَابَهُ ۥۤ أَحَدٌ۬ (٢٥) وَلَا يُوثِقُ وَثَاقَهُ ۥۤ أَحَدٌ۬ (٢٦) يَـٰٓأَيَّتُہَا ٱلنَّفۡسُ ٱلۡمُطۡمَٮِٕنَّةُ (٢٧) ٱرۡجِعِىٓ إِلَىٰ رَبِّكِ رَاضِيَةً۬ مَّرۡضِيَّةً۬ (٢٨) فَٱدۡخُلِى فِى عِبَـٰدِى (٢٩) وَٱدۡخُلِى جَنَّتِى (٣٠)

"No! When the earth has been leveled - pounded and crushed - And your Lord has come and the angels, rank upon rank, And brought [within view], that Day, is Hell - that Day, man will remember, but what good to him will be the remembrance? He will say, "Oh, I wish I had sent ahead [some good] for my life." So on that Day, none will punish [as severely] as His punishment, And none will bind [as severely] as His binding [of the evildoers]. [To the righteous it will be said], "O reassured soul, Return to your Lord, well-pleased and pleasing [to Him], And enter among My [righteous] servants, And enter My Paradise."

(Qur'an Al-Fajr 89:22-30)

May Allah guide us and protect us from the Hellfire. Ameen. Please don't forget us in your night prayers. JazakAllahu khairan.

And Allah knows best.
Wassalaam

Joking

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم
In the Name of Allah, Most Merciful, Most Compassionate
Assalaamu alaykum

Dear Friends

I pray that you are well.

It is not becoming of a person to joke excessively as it diminishes from a person's respectability, and can lead to straining relations between people, if not done properly. The amount of joking should be like the amount of salt in one’s food, as too much laughing and joking distracts one from the remembrance of Allah and kills the heart.

The Prophet, Allah bless him and grant him peace, said:

“Do not laugh too much, for laughing too much deadens the heart.” (Sahih al-Jaami)

‘Umar ibn al-Khattaab, Allah be pleased with him, said:

“Whoever laughs too much or jokes too much loses respect, and whoever persists in doing something will be known for it.”

It was said to Sufyan ibn ‘Uyayna,

“Joking is insulting (sabba),” he replied, “No, rather it is a sunna; but who can do it properly?”

Someone asked the Prophet, Allah bless him and grant him peace:

“Do you joke with us?” the Prophet, Allah bless him and grant him peace, replied: “I do, but I only say that which is true” (Bukhari, Tirmidhi)

A man came to the Prophet, Allah bless him and grant him peace, and said:

“Give me an animal to ride on” the Prophet, Allah bless him and grant him peace, replied: “I will give you the son of a female camel”. The man said with astonishment: “What could I do with the son of a female camel?” (Thinking that he would be given a camel too small to ride). Thereupon the Prophet, Allah bless him and grant him peace, replied: “What do female camels deliver except camels?” (i.e., that every camel, even if it is fully grown, is the product of a female camel!). (Abu Dawud & Tirmidhi).

Jokes should not involve verses from the Qur’an, hadith, or any of fundamentals of Islam. Some people tell jokes about the verses of the Qur’an, Prophets, Angels, hijab, beard, turbans, etc. This is the most dangerous because it can take a person out of the fold of Islam, even if he is only joking.

The Prophet, Allah bless him and grant him peace, said:

“A slave (of Allah) would utter a word, without paying attention to it, which would result in him going down into the Hellfire further than the distance between the east and the west.” (Muslim)

Allah says:

وَلَئِن سَأَلْتَهُمْ لَيَقُولُنَّ إِنَّمَا كُنَّا نَخُوضُ وَنَلْعَبُ ۚ قُلْ أَبِاللَّـهِ وَآيَاتِهِ وَرَسُولِهِ كُنتُمْ تَسْتَهْزِئُونَ ﴿٦٥﴾ لَا تَعْتَذِرُوا قَدْ كَفَرْتُم بَعْدَ إِيمَانِكُمْ ۚ إِن نَّعْفُ عَن طَائِفَةٍ مِّنكُمْ نُعَذِّبْ طَائِفَةً بِأَنَّهُمْ كَانُوا مُجْرِمِينَ ﴿٦٦

"If you ask them, they declare: ‘We were only talking idly and joking.’ Say: 'Is it Allah and His verses and His Messenger that you were mocking?' ’Make no excuse; you disbelieved after you had believed'"
(Qur'an At-Tauba 9:65-66)

So a brother with a turban and a beard is not a Sikh or a sister with long black abaya and long hijab is not a Nun.

Joking is permissible with the following conditions:

(a) it does not contain lies

The Prophet, Allah bless him and grant him peace, said,

“Woe to the one who speaks and tells a lie in order to make the people laugh at it. Woe to him. Then again, woe to him.” (Tirmidhi)

(b) it does not entail to frightening anyone

The Prophet, Allah bless him and grant him peace, said:

"It is not permissible for a Muslim to frighten another Muslim.” (Abu Dawud).

(c) it does not involve anything haram or impermissible such as mocking and backbiting.

Things that bring on Allah’s wrath and curse are certainly not things to joke about, for example vulgarity, adultery, wine drinking/drunkenness, gay culture, etc.

The Prophet, Allah bless him and grant him peace, said,

“Do not express malicious joy towards your brother’s misfortune, for Allah may have mercy on him and you may be stricken by the thing you made fun of.” (Tirmidhi)

Allah says:

يَا أَيُّهَا الَّذِينَ آمَنُوا لَا يَسْخَرْ قَوْمٌ مِّن قَوْمٍ عَسَىٰ أَن يَكُونُوا خَيْرًا مِّنْهُمْ وَلَا نِسَاءٌ مِّن نِّسَاءٍ عَسَىٰ أَن يَكُنَّ خَيْرًا مِّنْهُنَّ ۖ وَلَا تَلْمِزُوا أَنفُسَكُمْ وَلَا تَنَابَزُوا بِالْأَلْقَابِ ۖ بِئْسَ الِاسْمُ الْفُسُوقُ بَعْدَ الْإِيمَانِ ۚ وَمَن لَّمْ يَتُبْ فَأُولَـٰئِكَ هُمُ الظَّالِمُونَ ﴿١١

“O you who believe! Let not a group ridicule another group, it may be that the latter are better than the former. Nor let (some) women scoff at other women, it may be that the latter are better than the former. Nor defame one another, nor insult one another by nicknames. How bad is it to insult one’s brother after having Faith” (Qur'an Hujurat 49:11)

So, hold your laughter when you see your brother slips and falls in front of you, and you think the way he lands on the ground is so funny, and don't go and describe it to everybody at the masjid! (even if he appears not to mind it)

Some people joke with everyone indiscriminately, but scholars and the elderly have special status. So, you cannot joke around them like you do around your friends. You should also not joke with acquaintances or people you do not know because they might not understand your joke and this can lead to unpleasantness.

Like everything else, there is time and place for jokes, and we should not go overboard in our jokes and humor. If we follow the Sunnah of the Prophet, Allah bless him and grant him peace, and his guidance, we will not go wrong.

May Allah make us among the people of taqwa. Ameen. Please don't forget us in your night prayers. JazakAllahu khairan.

And Allah knows best.
Wassalaam

Cursing (al-La'n)

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم
In the Name of Allah, Most Merciful, Most Compassionate
Assalaamu alaykum

Dear Friends

I pray that you are well.

Al-La`n (curse) means deprivation of Allah's Mercy. The act of cursing is such that one who does it can become himself a victim of it. So, a person should abstain from cursing.

The Prophet, Allah bless him and give him peace, said, “If a slave curses somebody or something, the curse ascends to heaven, then the doors of the sky close before it, then it descends to the earth, then its doors close before it, then it goes right and left, then if it does not find a place to go, it returns to the one cursed if he is worthy of it otherwise it returns to the one who uttered it." (Abu Dawood)

The Prophet, Allah bless him and grant him peace, said, "Those who frequently resort to cursing (people) would neither be accepted as witnesses nor as intercessors on the Day of Resurrection." (Muslim)

The person like that has no value with Allah, and his testimony and intercession will not be considered on the Day of Judgement.

It is permissible to curse all those whom Allah and His Messenger have cursed, but it is impermissible to direct a curse towards a specific person unless it is certain that he died outside of Islam, for example Abu Jahl and Fir’aun. It is also impermissible to curse animals and inanimate objects.

A man cursed the wind in the presence of the Prophet, Allah bless him and grant
him peace, to which he replied, “Do not curse the wind, for it is commanded [i.e.
subservient to the command of Allah]. Verily, whoever curses something that is
not worthy of being cursed, the curse goes back to him.” (Tirmidhi)

It is reported that a man cursed a mosquito (burghuth), so the Prophet, Allah bless
him and grant him peace, said, “Don’t curse it, for it awoke a prophet of the
prophets of Allah for the prayer.” (Bukhari)

A person should not curse a Muslim who committed a sin, even a sin that deserves a
divinely prescribed punishment, rather, he seeks Allah’s forgiveness for him.

May Allah have mercy on us. Ameen. Please don't forget us in your night prayers. JazakAllahu khairan.

And Allah knows best.
Wassalaam

Insulting

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم
In the Name of Allah, Most Merciful, Most Compassionate
Assalaamu alaykum

Dear Friends

I pray that you are well.

Most people who insult other people are insecure, some are immature. They think that it will make them feel better if they put someone else down, or they think it will take attention off of themselves. Mature people should be able to communicate with others without insulting them. Matters can be discussed between mature adults without fighting or insulting each other.

The best way to handle an insult is to ignore it, because what the immature person wants is to make you upset. Walking away is always best because the immature person is not going to change and suddenly stop acting immature. If the person insulting you is someone you want to keep as a friend, you might say something like, "That really hurts when you say something like that. Can we talk without insults?" - this lets them know that they need to change their behavior, and if they are friends, they will want to change and mature.

It is impermissible to insult another person. The second party has the right to get back, but it is superior to forgive.

The Prophet, Allah bless him and grant him peace, said, “Those who insult each
other, what they say is upon the one who started, so long as the one wronged does
not go beyond the limits.”

Imam al-Nawawi comments on the hadith, “Its meaning is that the sin of the
insulting that took place between two people is specifically for the one who
started, unless the second goes beyond the extent of getting back, saying more to
the one who started than he said to him."

Allah Most High says:

وَلَمَنِ انتَصَرَ بَعْدَ ظُلْمِهِ فَأُولَـٰئِكَ مَا عَلَيْهِم مِّن سَبِيلٍ

"And whoso defend himself after he has suffered wrong - for such, there is no way (of blame) against them” (Qur’an Ash Shura 42:41)

وَالَّذِينَ إِذَا أَصَابَهُمُ الْبَغْيُ هُمْ يَنتَصِرُونَ

“And those who, when great wrong is done to them, defend themselves.” (Qur’an Ash Shura 42:39).

Despite this, patience and forgiveness is more virtuous.

Allah Most High says,

لَتُبْلَوُنَّ فِي أَمْوَالِكُمْ وَأَنفُسِكُمْ وَلَتَسْمَعُنَّ مِنَ الَّذِينَ أُوتُوا الْكِتَابَ مِن قَبْلِكُمْ وَمِنَ الَّذِينَ أَشْرَكُوا أَذًى كَثِيرًا ۚ وَإِن تَصْبِرُوا وَتَتَّقُوا فَإِنَّ ذَٰلِكَ مِنْ عَزْمِ الْأُمُورِ‌

"You will surely be tested in your possessions and in yourselves. And you will surely hear from those who were given the Scripture before you and from those who associate others with Allah much abuse. But if you are patient and fear Allah - indeed, that is the matters determining factor in all affairs." (Qur’an AleImran 3:186)

“Allah does not raise a servant by forgiving except in triumph.”

Remember, do lots of istighfaar as we ourselves are not free from sins, and this could be our punishment. [“Astaghfirullah” – “I seek Allah's forgiveness.”
or “Astaghfiruka wa atoobu ilaik” – “I seek Your forgiveness and return unto You."]

One of the benefits of istighfaar provides relief from hardships and eases grief.

The Prophet, Allah bless him and grant him peace, said: "If anyone continually asks pardon, Allah will appoint for him a way out of every distress, and a relief from every anxiety, and will provide for him from where he did not reckon." (Abu Dawud)

The Prophet, Allah bless him and grant him peace, said: “There is (at times) some sort of shade upon my heart, and I seek forgiveness from Allah a hundred times a day.” (Muslim)

May Allah protect us from the calamity of our tongues and other's tongues. Ameen. Please don't forget us in your night prayers. JazakAllahu khairan.

And Allah knows best.
Wassalaam

Lying

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم
In the Name of Allah, Most Merciful, Most Compassionate
Assalaamu alaykum

Dear Friends

I pray that you are well.

Lying is to inform of a matter contrary to reality. If this is accidental, it is overlooked, but if it is intentional then it is a clear sin that must be avoided at all costs. It is equally considered a lie whether one is serious or joking. A person should do his utmost to stick to the truth in all of his words, even if he fears it will take him to his destruction.

‘Umar ibn ‘Ubayd said,

“The perfection of a man in his religion is with four traits: he gives up hoping for what people possess, he hears hurtful words and bears them, he loves for people what he loves for himself and he doesn’t lie even if escape from troubles is through it.

The Prophet, Allah bless him and grant him peace, said:

“Verily speaking the truth leads to righteousness, and verily righteousness leads to the Garden, and verily a man tells the truth until he is written with Allah a truthful man. Verily lying leads to wickedness, and verily wickedness leads to the fire, and verily a man lies until he is written with Allah a liar.” (Bukhari and Muslim)

It is reported that the Prophet, Allah bless him and grant him peace, said:

“It is not permissible to lie except in three: a man lying to his wife to please her, a lie in war, and a lie to rectify between people.” (Tirmidhi)

Scholars conclude: If one desires to attain a praiseworthy goal which one can attain through lying and through speaking the truth, then lying is unlawful. If one can only acquire it by lying, then it is permissible if attaining the goal is permissible, and obligatory if attaining the goal is obligatory. Thus, if one sees someone innocent hiding from an oppressor who wants to harm him, lying is obligatory; and whenever the objective of a war, or rectifying between people and winning the heart of someone hurt by another, or pleasing one’s spouse is not possible except through lying then it is permissible.

If a judge asks of a vile act he performed secretly, such as adultery or drinking alcohol, then he says, “I didn’t do it,” because revealing a vile act is another vile act. He may also deny the secret of his friend. A person should compare the damage of lying with the damage of telling the truth; if the damage of telling the truth is more severe then he may lie, and if the other way around or he doubts then it is impermissible. If the lie is for himself it is best to not lie, and if it is for someone else then he may not forgo the right of another. The best is to leave it whenever permissible.

Why people lie and how to tell if they are...by Dr. Gail Saltz, psychiatrist

Everybody lies. It may only be “white” lies, but everyone tells lies or “omits the truth” sometimes. We start lying at around age 4 to 5 when children gain an awareness of the use and power of language. This first lying is not malicious, but rather to find out, or test, what can manipulated in a child’s environment. Eventually children begin to use lying to get out of trouble or get something they want. White lies, those concocted to protect someone’s feelings, are not a big deal at all. The person, however, who seems to feel compelled to lie about both the small and large stuff has a problem. We often call these folks pathological liars (which is a description, not a diagnosis). They lie to protect themselves, look good, gain financially or socially and avoid punishment. Quite often the person who has been deceived knows that this type of liar has to a certain extent deluded him or herself and is therefore to be somewhat pitied. A much more troubling group is those who lie a lot — and knowingly — for personal gain. These people may have a diagnosis called antisocial personality disorder, also known as being a sociopath, and often get into scrapes with the law. Lying often gets worse with the passage of time. When you get away with a lie it often impels you to continue your deceptions. Also, liars often find themselves perpetrating more untruths to cover themselves.

We hold different people to different standards when it comes to telling the truth. We expect, for example, less honesty from politicians than from scientists. We have a vision of purity about those who are doing research, while we imagine that politicians will at least shade the truth about themselves in order to get elected.

Why do we dislike liars, especially sociopaths, so much? It’s a matter of trust. When a person lies, they have broken a bond – an unspoken agreement to treat others as we would like to be treated. Serious deception often makes it impossible for us to trust another person again. Because the issue of trust is on the line, coming clean about the lie as soon as possible is the best way to mend fences. If the truth only comes out once it is forced, repair of trust is far less likely.

As a parent, the most important message you can send your children about lying is that you always — always — want them to come clean with you. No matter how big a whopper they have told, remind them that you would always rather hear the truth, no matter how bad it is, than be deceived. Tell them there is really nothing more sacred in your relationship than your trust of each other. Of course, all this presupposes that we have discovered an untruth — some people are so expert at deception that it often takes a long time to find out that we have been lied to.

How, then, can we best detect whether we are being misled? There is no foolproof way, but there are often clues you can see in behavior that should make you suspicious: Avoidance of eye contact: Usually someone makes eye contact at least half the time they are talking to you. If you notice them avoiding eye contact or looking down during a specific part of a conversation, they may well be lying. Change of voice: A variation in pitch of voice or rate of speech can be a sign of lying. So can lots of umms and ahhs. Body language: Turning your body away, covering your face or mouth, a lot of fidgeting of hands or legs can indicate deception. Contradicting yourself:. Making statements that just don’t hold together should make you suspicious. If you lie all the time, even about unimportant things, you are likely to have a problem that will eventually -- if it hasn’t already -- cause you real relationship, financial or legal troubles. Figuring out what is driving you to lie in the first place will help heal this self-destructive behavior. This may mean going into treatment with a therapist to discover why you feel the need to deceive.

May Allah guide us and protect us from lies. Ameen. Please don't forget us in your night prayers. JazakAllahu khairan.

And Allah knows best.
Wassalaam

A Day To Refocus

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم
In the Name of Allah, Most Merciful, Most Compassionate
Assalaamu alaykum

Dear Friends

I pray that you are well.

Friday is not like any other day. It is a day to help us refocus and do much good. This day should remind us of the Day of Judgment where everything will be spread out for us to see. We should have great concern for this. As Muslims we live for the next life. We will, one day, sooner than we think, have to move on to our next life, our eternal abodes (Paradise or Hell), with nothing except our deeds, leaving behind everything we love and cherish.

يَوْمَئِذٍ يَصْدُرُ النَّاسُ أَشْتَاتًا لِّيُرَوْا أَعْمَالَهُمْ ﴿٦﴾ فَمَن يَعْمَلْ مِثْقَالَ ذَرَّةٍ خَيْرًا يَرَهُ ﴿٧﴾ وَمَن يَعْمَلْ مِثْقَالَ ذَرَّةٍ شَرًّا يَرَهُ ﴿٨

That Day, the people will depart separated [into categories] to be shown [the result of] their deeds. So whoever does an atom's weight of good will see it, And whoever does an atom's weight of evil will see it.

(Qur'an Zalzala 99:6-8)

The Prophet, Allah bless him and grant him peace, said: "Friday is the best of days. It was on this day that Prophet Adam, Allah give him peace, was created, it was on this day that he was granted entry into Paradise, it was on this day that he was removed from Paradise (which became the cause for man's existence in this universe, and which is a great blessing), and the Day of Resurrection will also take place on this day." (Sahih Muslim)

As Muslims we should look forward to this day and prepare for it as if it is going to be Eid.

On one Friday, the Prophet, Allah bless him and give him peace, said: "O Muslims! Allah Ta'ala has made this day a day of eid. So have a bath on this day, whoever has perfume should apply it, and use the miswaak." (Ibn Majah)

Every Muslim should make preparations for Jumu'ah from Thursday. After the 'Asr prayer of Thursday, he should make a lot of istighfaar. The pious people of the past have stated that the person to receive the most benefit on Friday will be that person who waits for it and who makes preparations for it from Thursday. The most unfortunate person will be he who does not even know as to when Friday will fall, so much so that he will ask the people in the morning as to which day this is.

On this day, one should perform the major ritual purification (ghusl)--wash the body from head to toe thoroughly and completely. After making ghusl, a person should wear the best clothing that he possesses, and put on perfume (men only), if he has it. He should also clip his nails.

One should try to go to the masjid very early for the Friday prayer. The earlier a person goes, the more reward he will receive.

The Prophet, Allah bless him and grant him peace, said: "On the day of Jumu'ah, the angels stand at the entrance of that masjid in which Jumu'ah salaat is to be offered. They write down the name of the person who enters the masjid first, and thereafter the name of the person who follows, and they continue doing this. The person who entered first will receive the reward of sacrificing a camel in the path of Allah, the one who followed him will get the reward of sacrificing a cow, thereafter a chicken, thereafter the reward of giving an egg as charity in the path of Allah. Once the khutbah commences, the angels close the register and begin listening to the khutbah." (Bukhari and Muslim)

يَا أَيُّهَا الَّذِينَ آمَنُوا إِذَا نُودِيَ لِلصَّلَاةِ مِن يَوْمِ الْجُمُعَةِ فَاسْعَوْا إِلَىٰ ذِكْرِ اللَّـهِ وَذَرُوا الْبَيْعَ ۚ ذَٰلِكُمْ خَيْرٌ لَّكُمْ إِن كُنتُمْ تَعْلَمُونَ ﴿٩﴾ فَإِذَا قُضِيَتِ الصَّلَاةُ فَانتَشِرُوا فِي الْأَرْضِ وَابْتَغُوا مِن فَضْلِ اللَّـهِ وَاذْكُرُوا اللَّـهَ كَثِيرًا لَّعَلَّكُمْ تُفْلِحُونَ ﴿١٠﴾ وَإِذَا رَأَوْا تِجَارَةً أَوْ لَهْوًا انفَضُّوا إِلَيْهَا وَتَرَكُوكَ قَائِمًا ۚ قُلْ مَا عِندَ اللَّـهِ خَيْرٌ مِّنَ اللَّـهْوِ وَمِنَ التِّجَارَةِ ۚ وَاللَّـهُ خَيْرُ الرَّازِقِينَ ﴿١١

O you who have believed, when [the adhan] is called for the prayer on the day of Jumu'ah [Friday], then proceed to the remembrance of Allah and leave trade. That is better for you, if you only knew. And when the prayer has been concluded, disperse within the land and seek from the bounty of Allah, and remember Allah often that you may succeed. But when they saw a transaction or a diversion, [O Muhammad], they rushed to it and left you standing. Say, "What is with Allah is better than diversion and than a transaction, and Allah is the best of providers."

(Qur'an Juma'a 62:9-11)

One should try not to miss reciting Surah Kahf either before the Friday prayer or after it. There is a lot of reward in reciting it. Also there are many lessons to be learned from the stories in this surah.

The Prophet, Allah bless him and grant him peace, said: "The person who recites Surah Kahf on Fridays, a nur will appear for him from below the arsh as high as the skies. This light will help him in the darkness of the Day of Resurrection. And all the sins which he may have committed from the last Friday till this Friday will be forgiven." The scholars have written that this Hadith refers to minor sins because major sins are not forgiven without making sincere repentance.

May Allah bless your Friday. Ameen. Please don't forget us in your prayers. JazakAllahu khairan.

And Allah knows best.
Wassalaam

Arguing

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم
In the Name of Allah, Most Merciful, Most Compassionate
Assalaamu alaykum

Dear Friends

I pray that you are well.

Some people just find a reason to argue about anything and everything as if they have nothing else to do. Even the weather can lead them into a heated argument. Some others no matter what you say to them, it ends up in an argument and then when you try to explain or perhaps to correct yourself, they argue some more. And it can drain you if you continue their path.

What do you do when you detect such a people? Spare your words. Don't argue with them. Apply the Prophetic guidance--remain silent.

The Prophet, Allah bless him and give him peace, said, “Whoever believes in
Allah and the last day, then let him say the good or remain silent.”

Your silence is your sabr. It is raising your rank with Allah. And Allah is with the patient.

Of course, the religion is a fertile soil to start an argument. Somebody might come up to you right as you finished your prayer in the masjid and tell you, "You should raise your hands when you rise up from bowing!" or "You should fold your hands like this and place your hands here!" or "You should bow down so your back is perfectly parallel to the floor!" You know that you were right in your movements during prayer. So what should you do? Smile and say, "May Allah reward you" or the like. Have a good opinion of your brother/sister in Islam. You don't have to get defensive or embarrassed or try to correct the person.

Don't fall into the mistake of shaytan by thinking that you know more than the person next to you lest it might set things on fire. Many lay people, including those who regularly go to the masjid, have never studied the fiqh of prayers (and other personally obligatory worship for that matter), so when they tell you to do something or not to do something in the worship, they based it on partial knowledge which they might have extracted from a book that they have read or an internet site or from observing what some people do.

Whoever undertakes the communal obligation of commanding the good and forbidding the evil, he must be learned of the opinions of the scholars so that his command and prohibition return to matters that are agreed upon by scholars, and that he is gentle, tactful and not excessive in his words or deeds, and patient in the face of disliked matters that might proceed as a result. He is forbearing of what is said back to him; he should not get frustrated or annoyed. The learned person must ensure that he is not doing so out of pride from displaying one’s knowledge and the ignorance of the addressee; for such an intention is an evil greater than the evil he is forbidding.

We have to be extra careful when arguing about religion. If the purpose of the argument is to make the opponent ashamed and show one’s virtue , then it is unlawful. If one intends to make the truth manifest then it is permissible, and might be recommended. If we argue, we take the best method of arguing; namely with gentleness, easygoing, preferring the easier argument and basing it on well known and agreed upon premises.

The Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) said, “No people have gone
astray after guidance except that they were given argumentation.”

Allah Most High says,

ٱدْعُ إِلَىٰ سَبِيلِ رَبِّكَ بِٱلْحِكْمَةِ وَٱلْمَوْعِظَةِ ٱلْحَسَنَةِ ۖ وَجَٰدِلْهُم بِٱلَّتِى هِىَ أَحْسَنُ ۚ إِنَّ رَبَّكَ هُوَ أَعْلَمُ بِمَن ضَلَّ عَن سَبِيلِهِۦ ۖ وَهُوَ أَعْلَمُ بِٱلْمُهْتَدِينَ

“Invite (all) to the Way of thy Lord with wisdom and beautiful preaching; and argue with them in ways that are best and most gracious: Indeed, thy Lord knows very well those who have gone astray from His way, and He knows very well those who are guided.” (Qur’an An-Nahl 16:125)

May Allah guide us and not let us go astray. Ameen. Please don't forget us in your night prayers. JazakAllahu khairan.

And Allah knows best.
Wassalaam

Speaking About Sins

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم
In the Name of Allah, Most Merciful, Most Compassionate
Assalaamu alaykum

Dear Friends

I pray that you are well.

It is unlawful to speak about sins, whether they are your own sins or another person's sins (such as wine drinking sessions, adultery, gambling) without an acceptable reason for doing so, because it entails making the sins known and calls to it.

For example, you are in US and hosting a luncheon for a few friends, and without much thought, you shared the news, "I heard in the news today so-and-so European politician having an affair with his so-and-so intern and..." or "I heard so-and-so used to be a belly dancer but she repented..." There is no benefit to mention this (even if it is true) and so it is unlawful.

Likewise, investigating Muslims’ faults is also prohibited.

إِنَّ ٱلَّذِينَ يُحِبُّونَ أَن تَشِيعَ ٱلْفَٰحِشَةُ فِى ٱلَّذِينَ ءَامَنُوا۟ لَهُمْ عَذَابٌ أَلِيمٌۭ فِى ٱلدُّنْيَا وَٱلْءَاخِرَةِ ۚ وَٱللَّهُ يَعْلَمُ وَأَنتُمْ لَا تَعْلَمُونَ

“Those who love (to see) scandal published broadcast among the Believers, will have a grievous Penalty in this life and in the Hereafter: God knows, and you know not.” (Qur'an An-Nur 24:19).

Abdullah Ibn Umar, Allah be pleased with both father and son, reported: “One day, the Prophet, Allah bless him and grant him peace, climbed up the pulpit and said loudly: “O hypocrites who are Muslims in their words but into whose hearts faith failed to penetrate! Do not cause hardships to Muslims; do not criticize them; do not try to reveal their mistakes because whoever reveals his brother’s mistakes Allah will reveal his mistakes. If Allah reveals one’s mistakes, He will embarrass him publicly, even if the mistake is within his house (hidden from people).”

Abdullah ibn Mas’ud, Allah be pleased with him, said, “The people greatest in sins on Judgment Day are the ones most given to speaking of the unlawful (akhtharuhum khawdan fil-batil).”

The Prophet, Allah bless him and grant him peace, was reported to has said: “Muslims are brothers. They do not treat each other cruelly and do not give in each other to the enemy. Whoever meets a need of his Muslim brother Allah will meet a need of his own. Whoever saves a Muslim from a trouble, Allah will save him from one of his troubles on the Day of Judgment. Whoever conceals a Muslim’s fault, Allah will conceal his faults on the Day of Judgment.”

May Allah conceal our sins and help us guard our tongues against harmful speech. Ameen. Please don't forget us in your night prayers. JazakAllahu khairan.

And Allah knows best.
Wassalaam

Praising

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم
In the Name of Allah, Most Merciful, Most Compassionate
Assalaamu alaykum

Dear Friends

I pray that you are well.

A person should not praise another to their face as it is not free from problems. The person might be excessive in his praising and end up lying, or he might display love by the praising but not actually have that feelings of love and thus he is being a hypocrite, or he might bring about arrogance and conceitedness in the one praised which are destructive traits, or the one praised might be joyed by the praise, be pleased with himself and leave some good works as only those who are displeased with themselves actively perform good works.

If a person praises another for a good deed to encourage him to perform the like of it, and to encourage others to follow him then it is not blameworthy praise. Rather, it might be recommended if free from the above mentioned problems.

The religiously corrupt should not be praised. Rather, they should be censured.

If people praise you as being someone you are not, then you should resolve to be what they praise you of and increase the good action which people praise you for. For example, if people praise you as being religious, then you should increase your acts of worship. If people praise you as being generous during a fundraiser, then you should give more charity outside the fundraiser.

This du'a is recommended if someone praises you. This was the du'a of Ali Abi Talib, Allah be pleased with him.

اللهم لا تؤاخذني بما يفولون واغفرلي مالا يعلمون واجعاني خيرا مما يظنون

Allahumma laa tu'aakhithnee bimaa yaquluna, waghfir lee maa laa ya'lamuna [waj'alnee khayran mimmaa yadhunnun]

O Allah, do not call me to account for what they say and forgive me for what they have no knowledge of [and make me better than they imagine.] (Bukhari)

And Allah knows best.
Wassalaam

Backbiting

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم
In the Name of Allah, Most Merciful, Most Compassionate
Assalaamu alaykum

Dear Friends

I pray that you are well.

When you start talking about people, be very careful, for you might be entering into the dangerous zone of backbiting. Backbiting is to mention the negative points of a specific person known to you, or to imitate them or communicate them with signals or through writing, in a way of insult and hatred.

بِسْمِ اللَّـهِ الرَّحْمَـٰنِ الرَّحِيمِ
وَيْلٌ لِّكُلِّ هُمَزَةٍ لُّمَزَةٍ ﴿١﴾ الَّذِي جَمَعَ مَالًا وَعَدَّدَهُ ﴿٢﴾ يَحْسَبُ أَنَّ مَالَهُ أَخْلَدَهُ ﴿٣﴾ كَلَّا ۖ لَيُنبَذَنَّ فِي الْحُطَمَةِ ﴿٤﴾ وَمَا أَدْرَاكَ مَا الْحُطَمَةُ ﴿٥﴾ نَارُ اللَّـهِ الْمُوقَدَةُ ﴿٦﴾ الَّتِي تَطَّلِعُ عَلَى الْأَفْئِدَةِ ﴿٧﴾ إِنَّهَا عَلَيْهِم مُّؤْصَدَةٌ ﴿٨﴾ فِي عَمَدٍ مُّمَدَّدَةٍ ﴿٩

Woe unto every backbiter, slanderer, (1) who has gathered riches and counted them over (2) thinking his riches have made him immortal! (3) No indeed; he shall be thrust into the Crusher; (4) and what shall teach thee what is the Crusher; (5) The Fire of God kindled (6) roaring over the hearts (7) covered down upon them, (8) in columns outstretched. (9)

(Qur'an Al-Humaza 104:1-9)

This Meccan Surah condemns all sorts of scandal, backbiting, and selfish hoarding of wealth, as destroying the hearts and affections of men. Backbiting is one of the three vices condemned in the strongest terms in this Surah.

The Prophet, Allah bless him and give him peace, was asked, "What is
backbiting?" He said, "Mentioning your brother with what he detests." He asked,
"Have you considered if what I say is really in him?" He answered, "If what you
say is in him then you have backbitten him, and if what you say is not in him then
you have calumniated/slandered him." (Tirmidhi)

If you are in a gathering of backbiting, you are not free of backbiting even if you are only a listener, except by condemning it with your tongue; if you fear actual harm, then you condemn it in your heart. If you are able to stand up or change the topic then you must.

When people backbitten you, you shouldn't be spying on them for proof of backbiting. Why? Because, spying of them is busying yourself with what does not concern you.

Allah says,

يَا أَيُّهَا الَّذِينَ آمَنُوا اجْتَنِبُوا كَثِيرًا مِّنَ الظَّنِّ إِنَّ بَعْضَ الظَّنِّ إِثْمٌ ۖ وَلَا تَجَسَّسُوا وَلَا يَغْتَب بَّعْضُكُم بَعْضًا ۚ أَيُحِبُّ أَحَدُكُمْ أَن يَأْكُلَ لَحْمَ أَخِيهِ مَيْتًا فَكَرِهْتُمُوهُ ۚ وَاتَّقُوا اللَّـهَ ۚ إِنَّ اللَّـهَ تَوَّابٌ رَّحِيمٌ ﴿١٢

O believers, eschew much suspicion; some suspicion is a sin. And do not spy, neither backbite one another; would any of you like to eat the flesh of his brother dead? You would detest it. And fear Allah; indeed, Allah is Accepting of repentance and Merciful.

(Qur'an Al-Hujurat 49:12)

Remember, when people backbite you that is giving you reward, i.e your next life is benefiting by people backbiting you. And if you are so concerned about it, it shows that you really care about what people think. You shouldn't be so concerned about what people think. Allah is All-Seeing and All-Hearing. And to Allah is our return. We should be more concerned about Allah.

May Allah give us sabr. Ameen. Please don't forget us in your night prayers. JazakAllahu khairan.

And Allah knows best.
Wassalaam

Dealing With Problems

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم
In the Name of Allah, Most Merciful, Most Compassionate
Assalaamu alaykum

Dear Friends

I pray that you are well.

No one can say "My life is a bed of roses without thorns." Every rose has its thorn. Even the best of situations have their down-sides. We all have our own share of thorns in life, even as we speak, small and big, minor and major. A thorn defends the rose, harming only those who would steal the blossom (Chinese proverb). It is only a problem if you see them as problems.

The problem with thorns is our initial reaction to it and it can be worse if we immediately put out our defense mechanisms in high gear. If we are not careful, we can be jabbed all over and so we can't stop to see the beauty and smell the sweet fragrance of the rose altogether.

Problems are nothing but our opportunity to draw ourselves nearer to the Lord. It is as if Allah is calling you to Him with each thorn prick. He is in control of everything. He can do anything. He can change anything. He is the King, Mighty and Majestic. All you need to do is turn to Him and ask.

How do we react when that issue stands right in our face? This is what seems effective for me.

Step #1: Try not to open your mouth immediately unless you remember how to smile. So open it slightly and give a big smile. Say Alhamdulillah (All praises be to Allah).

Step #2: Immediately, softly or silently, say the isti'ada (seeking refuge from the accursed Shaytan--A'udhu billahi minashshaytanir rajeem) and do lots of istighfar (seeking Allah's forgiveness--Astaghfirullah Al-Adhim) as you rush to the bathroom to take wudu' (even if you have wudu'). This will cool you off, inshaAllah.

Step #3: Pray 2 raka'a. This will comfort you, inshaAllah.

If you are outdoor and can't do wudu' or pray, send lots of blessings upon the Prophet, Allah bless him and grant him peace (Allahumma salli 'ala Sayyidina Muhammad wa 'ala alihi wa sahbihi wassallam). There are numerous benefits and rewards of sending blessings on the Prophet, Allah bless him and grant him peace.

Allah most high says:

إِنَّ ٱللَّهَ وَمَلَـٰٓئِكَتَهُۥ يُصَلُّونَ عَلَى ٱلنَّبِىِّ ۚ يَـٰٓأَيُّهَا ٱلَّذِينَ ءَامَنُوا۟ صَلُّوا۟ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلِّمُوا۟ تَسْلِيمًا ﴿٥٦

“Allah and His angels send blessings on the Prophet, O you who believe, send blessings on him and salute him with all respect.” (Qur’an Al-Ahzab 33:56)

Abu Huraira (Allah be pleased with him) relates that the Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) said, “He who sends blessings on me once, Allah sends him blessings ten times.” (Muslim)

Anas ibn Malik (Allah be pleased with him) relates that the Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) said, “He who sends blessings on me once Allah sends blessings on him ten times and removes from him ten sins and raises him by ten degrees.” (Nasa'i).

Ubayy ibn Ka`b (Allah be pleased with him) relates: I said, "O Messenger of Allah, I send much blessings on you. What proportion of my prayer should I devote to you?" He said, "As much as you like." I said, "A quarter?" He said, “As much as you like, and if you increased it would only be better for you.” I said, “Then a half?” He said, “As much as you like and if you increased then it would only be better for you.” I said, “Then two thirds?” He said, “As much as you like and if you increased it would only be better for you.” I said, “I'll devote all of my prayers to sending blessings on you.” The Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) said, “In that case it will suffice you from your worries and your sins will be forgiven." (Reported by Tirmidhi who declared it well authenticated)

Step #4: Make supplication. Ask Allah to give you patience and to reward you for the difficulty and relieve you from the difficulty.

Step #5: Recite some Qur'an, including the surahs of protection--Ayatul Kursi, Al-Ikhlas, Al-Falaq, An-Nas. If you want to do more, read surah Yaasin. It is good to memorize these surahs and make them a part of your daily practice.

Obviously, whatever we read we should understand the meaning. Don't think parroting the words has the same effect as knowing what we read and reciting it correctly. To get the full effect and benefits, we should resolve to learn its meanings and to learn how to read it correctly as well and take steps to accomplish this (for example by learning Arabic and taking classes on reading the Qur'an correctly). Allah will make easy the path. InshaAllah.

InshaAllah, you will have a different outlook of the issue at hand and can deal with it in a prudent manner.

Remember, the Prophet, Allah bless him and grant him peace, went through greater difficulties than anyone. He is the beloved of Allah.

Remember, with hardship is ease. Allah said so in the Qur'an. We shouldn't entertain any doubts about this.

بِسْمِ ٱللَّهِ ٱلرَّحْمَـٰنِ ٱلرَّحِيمِ
أَلَمْ نَشْرَحْ لَكَ صَدْرَكَ ﴿١﴾ وَوَضَعْنَا عَنكَ وِزْرَكَ ﴿٢﴾ ٱلَّذِىٓ أَنقَضَ ظَهْرَكَ ﴿٣﴾ وَرَفَعْنَا لَكَ ذِكْرَكَ ﴿٤﴾ فَإِنَّ مَعَ ٱلْعُسْرِ يُسْرًا ﴿٥﴾ إِنَّ مَعَ ٱلْعُسْرِ يُسْرًا ﴿٦﴾ فَإِذَا فَرَغْتَ فَٱنصَبْ ﴿٧﴾ وَإِلَىٰ رَبِّكَ فَٱرْغَب ﴿٨

Did We not widen your bosom? And relieve you of the burden – Which had broken your back? And We have exalted your remembrance for you. So indeed with hardship is ease. Indeed with hardship is ease. So when you finish the prayer, strive in supplication. And incline towards your Lord. (Qur'an Ash-Sharh 94)

May Allah make our journey easy. May Allah fill our hearts with love of His beloved Prophet, Allah bless him and grant him peace, and guide us to live in accordance to his exalted and noble sunna. Ameen. Please don't forget us in your night prayers. JazakAllahu khairan.

Allah alone gives success. And Allah knows best.
Wassalaam

Addicted To Music & Pornography--videos

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم
In the Name of Allah, Most Merciful, Most Compassionate
Assalaamu alaykum

Dear Friends

I pray that you are well.

Something we should be wary.

Addicted to music on The Deen Show

Pornography -- Climbing Mt. Purgatorio, 3 parts video by Shaykh Hamza Yusuf

part 1
part 2
part 3

Hope they are of benefit. May Allah protect us from the two evils. Ameen.

Wassalaam.

Human Action

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم
In the Name of Allah, Most Merciful, Most Compassionate
Assalaamu alaykum

Dear Friends

I pray that you are well.

Each human action has a ruling attached to it and we will see the consequence in the Judgment Day. Every single action you do, whether it be moving your hand, looking at something, hearing something, sleeping, walking, talking, or using the bathroom, Allah assigns a particular ruling, since eternity, to that action.

We should know then whether what we are going to do is *Obligatory (fard), Necessary (wajib), Emphasized Sunnah (sunna mu'akkada), Recommended (mustahabb), Permissible (mubah), Somewhat Disliked (makruh tanzihan), Prohibitively Disliked (makruh tahriman), or Forbidden (Haram).

1) Obligatory (Allah firmly commanded us to do it. Denying it is disbelief; obeying it is rewarded and leaving it is sinful, e.g. 5 daily prayers, fast in Ramadhan, pay zakat, perform hajj, cover your nakedness, lower your gaze, kind treatment of our parents, seek personally obligatory knowledge.)

2) Necessary (Allah firmly commanded us to do it. Denying it is corruption, not disbelief; obeying it is rewarded and leaving it is sinful. e.g. witr prayer)

3) Emphasized Sunna (what the Prophet, Allah bless him and grant him peace, generally did and rarely left and was not of worldly habits. Performing it is rewarded, leaving it, without some excuse, is blameworthy but not sinful. However, habitually leaving it is sinful because it entails to "turning away" from the guidance of the Prophet, Allah bless him and grant him peace, whom we have been commanded to follow. e.g. certain cycles of sunnah prayers before and after the prescribed daily prayers, tahajjud prayers)

4) Recommended (what the Prophet, Allah bless him and grant him peace, did sometimes and left it sometimes, or was of his worldly habits. Performing it is rewarded but leaving it is not sinful or blameworthy but leaving it one is losing out on a great good by doing it.)

5) Permissible (acts which are neither rewarded nor punished but rewarded if conjoined with good intentions. e.g. drinking water, going to work, going to sleep, talking. There is a consequence of time. A person should realize he owes Allah. Life is short and consequence is great. So when you go to sleep, you intend to sleep for the sake of pleasing Allah, giving your body strength so you can serve Allah.)

6) Somewhat Disliked (things that are best to leave even though it is not sinful. Leaving it is rewarded and doing it is acting suboptimally)

7) Prohibitively Disliked (we are firmly commanded to leave. Denying such a command is misguidance but not disbelief. Performing the action is sinful, leaving it is rewarded)

8) Forbidden (Allah firmly commanded us to leave it. Leaving it is rewarded, doing it is sinful. e.g. dealing with riba/interest, backbiting/slandering/talebearing, stealing, cheating, lying, gambling, adultery/fornication, pornography, certain music and musical instruments, hurting others)

Everything you do carries weight. Even something permissible it has weightiness.

يَوْمَئِذٍ يَصْدُرُ ٱلنَّاسُ أَشْتَاتًا لِّيُرَوْا۟ أَعْمَـٰلَهُمْ ﴿٦﴾ فَمَن يَعْمَلْ مِثْقَالَ ذَرَّةٍ خَيْرًا يَرَهُۥ ﴿٧﴾ وَمَن يَعْمَلْ مِثْقَالَ ذَرَّةٍ شَرًّا يَرَهُۥ

Upon that day men shall issue in scatterings to see their works, (6) and whoso has done an atom's weight of good shall see it, (7) and whoso has done an atom's weight of evil shall see it. (8)

(Qur'an Zalzala 99:6-8)

If you really understand this, it will change your view of life and the world, and how you prioritize and conduct your life. You will not be wasteful with the resources which Allah blesses you with, including your time, health and wealth. Instead, you are conscious in what you do with them.

All of a sudden you will find enjoyment in reciting and listening to the Qur'an or listening to a Shaykh's lessons or speeches and not bored by them, and you no longer feel entertained with singing or listening to music or watching movies or aimlessly surfing the internet, aimlessly wondering in shopping centers or malls, gabbing on the phone or reading People's magazine or reading news that cause you to waste your time or news that fall in the category of backbiting/slandering (e.g. about a royal wedding or about so and so) or watching people kicking and throwing balls on the big screen. No longer we will buy things that appear in the market so as to conform with other people or to keep up with the technology. For example, we don't buy a new laptop or cell phone for the sake of changing but we work it to death before we replace it and only for the purpose of what could bring us closer to Allah, Mighty and Majestic. These are just some examples of the transformation that could happen once we understand what each of our actions, to its finest detail, means. No doubt, all our actions need to conform to His law. By following the law we are doing ourselves a favor in this life and the next, and by turning away from it we are harming ourselves.

لَا جَرَمَ أَنَّمَا تَدْعُونَنِىٓ إِلَيْهِ لَيْسَ لَهُۥ دَعْوَةٌ فِى ٱلدُّنْيَا وَلَا فِى ٱلْءَاخِرَةِ وَأَنَّ مَرَدَّنَآ إِلَى ٱللَّهِ وَأَنَّ ٱلْمُسْرِفِينَ هُمْ أَصْحَـٰبُ ٱلنَّارِ ﴿٤٣

...because our returning is to God; and because the transgressors will be inmates of Hell. (Qur'an Ghafir 40:43)

ثَمَـٰنِيَةَ أَزۡوَٲجٍ۬‌ۖ مِّنَ ٱلضَّأۡنِ ٱثۡنَيۡنِ وَمِنَ ٱلۡمَعۡزِ ٱثۡنَيۡنِ‌ۗ قُلۡ ءَآلذَّڪَرَيۡنِ حَرَّمَ أَمِ ٱلۡأُنثَيَيۡنِ أَمَّا ٱشۡتَمَلَتۡ عَلَيۡهِ أَرۡحَامُ ٱلۡأُنثَيَيۡنِ‌ۖ نَبِّـُٔونِى بِعِلۡمٍ إِن ڪُنتُمۡ صَـٰدِقِينَ (١٤٣)

...But waste not by excess: for Allah loves not the wasters. (Qur'an Al An'am 6:141)

Allah sets the limits to all our actions. If we go beyond these limits, we are subjecting ourselves to His anger. If we maintain within the limits, we are subject of His pleasure, by His Mercy.

Allah puts us here to worship Him and so our goal in life should be just that--to serve and please Him alone, and not to earn His anger. By knowing our limits, we can maximize the fulfillment of our responsibilities that Allah has placed on our shoulders as His khalifah/vice-regent on earth. We should be reminded of our invocation during our daily prayers.

ٱهْدِنَا ٱلصِّرَ‌ٰطَ ٱلْمُسْتَقِيمَ ﴿٦﴾ صِرَ‌ٰطَ ٱلَّذِينَ أَنْعَمْتَ عَلَيْهِمْ غَيْرِ ٱلْمَغْضُوبِ عَلَيْهِمْ وَلَا ٱلضَّآلِّينَ ﴿٧

You only we serve; to You alone we pray for succor. (5) Guide us in the straight path, (6) the path of those whom You have blessed, not of those against whom You are wrathful, nor of those who are astray. (7) (Qur'an Al-Fatiha 1:5-7)

Ameen.

Please keep us in your prayers. JazakAllahu khairan.

And Allah knows best,
Wassalaam
*-based on Hanafi Mazhab