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Cultivating Haya' (Modesty) in an Immoral World
بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم
Cultivating Haya' (Modesty) in an Immoral World
Haya’ includes a deep-rooted sense of humility that prevents one from behaving boastfully, shamelessly promoting oneself at the expense of others, indulging in self-aggrandizement, and ascribing goodness and purity to oneself.
The Prophet (ﷺ) said, "Faith (Belief) consists of more than sixty branches (i.e. parts). And Haya’ is a part of faith." (Bukhari)
Cultivating Haya’-- physical and spiritual -- is equal for men and women. The Qur’an addresses believing men before women, with the injunction to: “…limit or reduce some of their vision and guard their private parts. That is purer for them.” [Qur’an, An-Noor 24:30]
The Prophet (ﷺ) was “more bashful than a veiled virgin girl.” [Bukhari & Muslim]
Several male companions were known for their sense of haya' – most notably 'Uthman Bin Affan, the Prophet’s son-in-law and the third righteous Khalifah.
Aisha (r.a) reported that once the Prophet (ﷺ) was sitting in a reclining posture in her chamber and received two of his companions, Abu Bakr and 'Umar, but sat up in a more formal way to receive 'Uthman, in recognition of his modesty. Aisha said, "...Abu Bakr entered, and you did not stir and did not observe much care (in arranging your clothes), then `Umar entered, and you did not stir and did not arrange your clothes, then `Uthman entered, and you got up and set your clothes right, so he (ﷺ) said: Should I not show modesty to one whom even the Angels show modesty." [Bukhari]
The Companion Dihyah Al-Kalbi (r.a) had such a pleasing appearance that he voluntarily wore a face-covering whenever he went out to avoid being the cynosure of all eyes.
The heightened sense of modesty among the companions reflected their strong faith.
The Prophet (ﷺ) said: Allah deserves one’s sense of haya more than people do. [Bukhari]
So, even though it is not obligatory to wear hijab in the home while alone or around mahram (unmarriageable relatives) only, it is a general proper etiquette (adab) to cover the body and wear a head covering in the home when reasonably possible, as an expression of one’s modesty and dignity before Allah. Likewise, it is proper adab for men to cover their bodies (beyond between the navel and knees) and have their heads covered at home as well. If you do this, not only is it an expression of modesty and dignity before Allah, but you are also inculcating haya' in your children.
May Allah make the knowledge of Islam sink into our hearts and return us our glory and 'izzah (honor) that we have lost at our own hands. Aameen.
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