Man and woman

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم
In the Name of Allah, Most Merciful, Most Compassionate
Assalaamu alaykum

Dear Friends

I pray that you are well.

Man are man and woman are woman. The best among us are the ones who have taqwa. We are creations of Allah--Allah does not discriminate. We complement each other and we need each other. Man cannot be woman and woman cannot be man. Manliness in man and femininity in woman is self respect and to imitate the other gender is having no self respect. Manliness too is not yelling, screaming, beating, raising your manly voice, scaring your woman--on the contrary you should be very gentle with them. The Prophet, Allah bless him and grant him peace, would not even raise his voice in the marketplace.

Just because Hawwa was created from Adam's ribs this does not mean woman is inferior than man. Rather, it shows that woman is your partner working side by side just as the ribs are on your side. Now just because ribs are bent, that doesn't mean woman are crooked (evil)--can you imagine if Allah created your ribs straight? It will be very painful for you to be walking around with bones sticking out your flesh. And if you try to straighten your ribs, it will break. So be very gentle with your ribs and don't ignore your ribs because you do need your ribs otherwise you will have no shape like the amoeba. This is a brilliant analogy I heard from a wise man a while back (I added the "amoeba" part). MashaAllah.

And to woman, to continue the analogy--you are neither above man nor below man. You are there not to tell them what to do--there are things best leave them up to them even if you think you are right. For example, if you see your husband driving a certain way that you don't like, tell yourself that he has been driving all these years to work without you and he came home safe. So, save the argument in the car--leave him alone, he might not listen to you anyway. You are there to protect his vital organ--the heart. And your femininity is not for public enjoyment. Don't show your adornments in public--it is for yourself and the heart of your man. And don't behave too feminine in public as well--like acting shy (giggling and so on) in such a way that it unnecessarily attract attention. Woman/girls should be direct and clear in public so not to attract attention.

And Allah knows best.

May Allah bless your day. Ameen. Please don't forget us in your night prayers. JazakAllahu khairan.

Wassalaam