Arguing

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم
In the Name of Allah, Most Merciful, Most Compassionate
Assalaamu alaykum

Dear Friends

I pray that you are well.

Some people just find a reason to argue about anything and everything as if they have nothing else to do. Even the weather can lead them into a heated argument. Some others no matter what you say to them, it ends up in an argument and then when you try to explain or perhaps to correct yourself, they argue some more. And it can drain you if you continue their path.

What do you do when you detect such a people? Spare your words. Don't argue with them. Apply the Prophetic guidance--remain silent.

The Prophet, Allah bless him and give him peace, said, “Whoever believes in
Allah and the last day, then let him say the good or remain silent.”

Your silence is your sabr. It is raising your rank with Allah. And Allah is with the patient.

Of course, the religion is a fertile soil to start an argument. Somebody might come up to you right as you finished your prayer in the masjid and tell you, "You should raise your hands when you rise up from bowing!" or "You should fold your hands like this and place your hands here!" or "You should bow down so your back is perfectly parallel to the floor!" You know that you were right in your movements during prayer. So what should you do? Smile and say, "May Allah reward you" or the like. Have a good opinion of your brother/sister in Islam. You don't have to get defensive or embarrassed or try to correct the person.

Don't fall into the mistake of shaytan by thinking that you know more than the person next to you lest it might set things on fire. Many lay people, including those who regularly go to the masjid, have never studied the fiqh of prayers (and other personally obligatory worship for that matter), so when they tell you to do something or not to do something in the worship, they based it on partial knowledge which they might have extracted from a book that they have read or an internet site or from observing what some people do.

Whoever undertakes the communal obligation of commanding the good and forbidding the evil, he must be learned of the opinions of the scholars so that his command and prohibition return to matters that are agreed upon by scholars, and that he is gentle, tactful and not excessive in his words or deeds, and patient in the face of disliked matters that might proceed as a result. He is forbearing of what is said back to him; he should not get frustrated or annoyed. The learned person must ensure that he is not doing so out of pride from displaying one’s knowledge and the ignorance of the addressee; for such an intention is an evil greater than the evil he is forbidding.

We have to be extra careful when arguing about religion. If the purpose of the argument is to make the opponent ashamed and show one’s virtue , then it is unlawful. If one intends to make the truth manifest then it is permissible, and might be recommended. If we argue, we take the best method of arguing; namely with gentleness, easygoing, preferring the easier argument and basing it on well known and agreed upon premises.

The Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) said, “No people have gone
astray after guidance except that they were given argumentation.”

Allah Most High says,

ٱدْعُ إِلَىٰ سَبِيلِ رَبِّكَ بِٱلْحِكْمَةِ وَٱلْمَوْعِظَةِ ٱلْحَسَنَةِ ۖ وَجَٰدِلْهُم بِٱلَّتِى هِىَ أَحْسَنُ ۚ إِنَّ رَبَّكَ هُوَ أَعْلَمُ بِمَن ضَلَّ عَن سَبِيلِهِۦ ۖ وَهُوَ أَعْلَمُ بِٱلْمُهْتَدِينَ

“Invite (all) to the Way of thy Lord with wisdom and beautiful preaching; and argue with them in ways that are best and most gracious: Indeed, thy Lord knows very well those who have gone astray from His way, and He knows very well those who are guided.” (Qur’an An-Nahl 16:125)

May Allah guide us and not let us go astray. Ameen. Please don't forget us in your night prayers. JazakAllahu khairan.

And Allah knows best.
Wassalaam