بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم
In the Name of Allah, Most Merciful, Most Compassionate
Assalaamu alaykum
Dear Friends
I pray that you are well.
When we truly believe that everything comes Allah, it is very easy to handle losses, disappointments, difficulties and the like. The same way Allah take away something from you, allow disappointments to creep into your hearts, afflict you with pain, Allah can give you back what you have lost or give you something better; Allah can give you satisfaction and contentment, Allah can ease your problem. He says, "Be" and it is. That does not mean you can be a passive human being and wait for it to "be" or the unemotional one--that you don't cry, that you don't feel. Far from that. In fact, the opposite. You must act in a positive manner--take steps to relieve your burden, keeping in mind that Allah has chosen what is best for you so you should not resent it. You are allowed to cry and grieve for a time--it is the mercy that you have in your heart whether you are a man or a woman. I don't know who came up with this statement that boys don't cry. Well, all my brothers cry (sometimes worse than me) and I saw my father cry when I was a girl. MashaAllah they are among the most compassionate and helpful people I know.
Actually, we all need a big cry. The biggest cry is when you see the ummah of the Prophet, Allah bless him and grant him peace, is deteriorating, and we are deteriorating. Religion is on the wayside for many and ignorance is pretty common. This affects us all collectively. You see thousands of people going to occasional Islamic knowledge-based events but once the event is over, the knowledge disappears before it even brought into practice.You see hardly any people come to the masjids and it is always the same people who come or contribute their time and money to the masjids.
We forget and some don't know that the first thing that the Prophet, Allah bless him and grant him peace, did when he entered an area was to build a masjid for people to congregate in worship and provide a place where knowledge can be acquired. The masjid An-Nabawi in Madinah for example, was not only a place of worship but also a center of learning and it was there many great early scholars were produced whose knowledge we benefit until today.
But many of our mosques today are pretty quiet because not many people frequent them and so no activities take place or maybe people don't frequent them because there are no activities. But Allah already set some activities for us to follow everyday--the five daily prayers and the Friday prayer. Especially for a resident man, it is obligatory to perform the Jum'ah prayer (with a few exceptions) and it is important for man to pray at the masjid. The wisdom behind this is obvious.
So when bad things happen to you or something happen that you don't like, perhaps it is a wake up call, perhaps it is begging you to do something positive, perhaps it is to strengthen your iman, perhaps it is to raise you higher. Regardless, it is the most suitable for you for your circumstance and you should be grateful that it is happening. The minimum you should do is don't complain. Be content with it and if you can't then be patient and endure for that which is unpleasant lies much good.
We should learn from Umm Ayman Barakah, Allah be pleased with her, who was the first person to hold the Prophet, Allah bless him and grant him peace, in her arms when he was born and the only person who knew him from that point until his death. Her devotion to the religion of Islam was strong and unshakable. She tied her well-being to that of Islam. During a visit from the Prophet, Allah bless him and grant him peace, he asked: "Ya Ummi! Are you well?" and she would reply: "I am well, O Messenger of Allah so long as Islam is." After the Prophet, Allah bless him and grant him peace, had died, Umm Ayman would often be found with tears in her eyes. She was asked by Abu Bakr and Omar, Allah be pleased with them, "Why are you crying?" and she replied: "By Allah, I knew that the Messenger of Allah would die but I cry now because the revelation from on high has come to an end for us." (and Abu Bakr and Omar wept along when they heard this).
What do you weep about? When you cry, you don't cry about losing something of this world--your job, your house, your money, your wife, your children--but about losing the opportunity to do good for the next world. And we have plenty of opportunities to do good for this world and the next eternal world--all for our own well-being. Grab it while you can.
May Allah guide us to do good with excellence. Ameen. Please don't forget us in your night prayers. Jazakallahu khairan.
And Allah knows best.
Wassalaam
