بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم
In the Name of Allah, Most Merciful, Most Compassionate
Assalaamu alaykum
Dear Friends
I pray that you are well.
I cannot tell you how sad and disturbed I have been for the past few weeks since I received the heartbreaking news. How would you feel if you see someone you love in handcuffs and shackles? I wasn't about to go to this court hearing because I know I would not be able to avoid such a scene. I know my heart won't be able to bear it. But I felt I had to put my feelings aside to give moral support to my friend.
So I called my friend the day before the court hearing and told her that I was planning to be with her in court. She was very happy and thanked me vehemently--for she did not expect that I would attend being aware of my other obligations. There we sat nervously in the courtroom waiting for the case to be called. There he came out into the courtroom with hand cuffs and shackles! At that moment we both came to tears. Both of us have a great love for him in different ways--she, a mother's love and me, a love for a brother in Islam. I do not wish anything like this to happen to anyone, especially to our children and our youths--they are our future and the future of Islam. He gazed at us from the other side of the courtroom and we raised our hands and moved our lips to say assalaamu alaykum. He returned our salaams with lip movements. My friend just could not stop sobbing!
As I am writing this to you I am crying remembering that day and anticipating his future. Only Allah knows what his future is going to be, but please make du'a for him and this family. And I hope when you read this you can feel if this is your son. I hope this will motivate you to do something quickly to bring youths (teenagers to 40 year olds) to the masjid. Our youths need proper Islamic education, lots of support growing up and in raising their own families in this very trying and difficult times.
As well, Muslims need to set models for others to learn from. We cannot be the criminals.
In all domestic violence cases, it is because someone could not control his anger. The consequence of this is very grave. The criminal justice system is tougher than before--so don't take this lightly.
We need to control our anger because uncontrollable anger leads to destruction. We see this over and over again.
If one gets angry, then it is necessary that the person performs a muhasabah, which is to account oneself of the mistakes committed, what leads to them and how to overcome them in the future. This is an important training for us to improve ourselves.
The Prophet, Allah bless him and grant him peace, said that anger comes from the shaytan. Shaytan is our open enemy and shaytan promotes evil and creates disputes among us. Shaytan promotes evil to people by influencing their perception.
"And say to My servants (that) they should (only) speak that which is the best; (Because) shaytan verily sows dissensions among them. Surely, Shaytan is an open enemy to man." Qur'an Al-Isra' 17:53
Indeed, if somebody uses a vague word in his speech, then Shaytan ‘whispers’ a wrong interpretation or understanding to the listeners of the speech that may affect the relationship amongst them. This is how relationships in the family, brothers, sisters and friends are severed.
Allah mentions the qualities of the Muttaqin (God-fearing): “Those who spend (in Allah’s cause) in prosperity and in adversity, who repress their anger, and who pardon men, verily, Allah loves the Muhsinun (the good-doers).” Qur'an AleImran 3:133-134
Abu Hurairah, Allah be well pleased with him, reported that a man said to the Prophet, Allah bless him and grant him peace "Advise me! "The Prophet said, "Do not become angry and furious." The man asked (the same) again and again, and the Prophet said in each case, "Do not become angry and furious."
Abu Hurairah related that the Messenger of Allah, Allah bless him and grant him peace, said: "A strong person is not the person who throws his adversaries to the ground. A strong person is the person who contains himself when he is angry." (Bukhari)
Our Prophet, Allah bless him and grant him peace, taught us how to control our anger.
The Prophet, Allah bless him and grant him peace, said, "I know a word, the saying of which will cause him to relax, if he does say it. If he says: 'I seek Refuge with Allah from Shaytan' then all his anger will go away." (Bukhari)
The Prophet, Allah bless him and grant him peace, said: “Anger comes from the devil, the devil was created of fire, and fire is extinguished only with water; so when one of you becomes angry, he should perform ablution.” (Abu Daud)
Abu Dharr , Allah be well pleased with him, narrated: The Prophet, Allah bless him and grant him peace, said to us: "When one of you becomes angry while standing, he should sit down. If the anger leaves him, well and good; otherwise he should lie down." (Abu Daud)
The Prophet, Allah bless him and grant him peace, said: "If one of you becomes angry then he should be silent.”
And from the du'a (supplications) of the Prophet, Allah bless him and grant him peace, "I ask you O Allah, for truthful speech during times of pleasure and anger" (Nasaai and Ahmad)
There are praiseworthy anger as known from the examples of the Prophet, Allah bless him and grant him peace. He never got angry except when the commandments of Allah are violated. If we want to get angry for the sake of Allah, then we need to be careful that we are really not getting angry for ourselves or for our own interests, and we do not commit wrong and illegal actions like using harsh, disparage or vulgar words, or beating up somebody. If the commanding or forbidding leads to more harm than benefit, then it should be avoided based on the principle of weighing between the benefits and harms.
It is also known in the medical arena that anger causes many health problems especially if they are not controlled. All shari’ah injunctions are for our benefit, even if we don't know them (as yet) but strive to follow them anyway. And our beloved Prophet, Allah bless him and grant him peace, is our best example.
May Allah guide us all and grant us tawfiq. May Allah protect our youths. Ameen. Please don't forget us in your night prayers. Jazakallahu khairan.
Wassalaam
related reading:
http://journey2allah.blogspot.com/2010/05/who-is-shepherd.html
http://journey2allah.blogspot.com/2010/05/true-shepherd.html
http://journey2allah.blogspot.com/2010/05/going-back-to-nature.html
