How Your Children Are Going To Turn Out

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم I
n the Name of Allah, Most Merciful, Most Compassionate
Assalaamu alaykum

Dear Friends

I pray that you are well.

Parenting and being parents is a lifelong struggle. We have aspirations of who we want to be as parents and we strive to achieve them. But there is no guarantee how our children are going to turn out.

Parents can be the most pious, practicing, loving parents, nonetheless they can have many disappointments by their children at every turn. These parents are in the company of prophets like Prophet Adam and Prophet Nuh (upon whom be peace) who had sons who rejected their teachings — yet these were fathers who were from among the best of humanity, parents who were in a constant state of supplication and prayer, who received guidance from Allah Almighty.

There is great comfort in knowing that parents will be rewarded not for how our children “turn out” but for the intentions we had while raising them, for the steps we took to facilitate their spiritual growth and success. All we can do is take the means; the end is up to Allah. Even if your children go astray, you should always leave a ‘door’ open for them and pray that they will one day ‘come back’. We should never cut off relations; we should never despair of Allah’s Mercy and Guidance.

We should never feel safe or believed that we have done a good job raising our children either. No matter how great life is, how righteous your family is, no one is safe until he/she dies with iman (faith) (husn al-khatima). Always and continue to pray for tawfiq (success).

وَٱلَّذِينَ يَقُولُونَ رَبَّنَا هَبْ لَنَا مِنْ أَزْوَٰجِنَا وَذُرِّيَّـٰتِنَا قُرَّةَ أَعْيُنٍ وَٱجْعَلْنَا لِلْمُتَّقِينَ إِمَامًا ﴿٧٤

Our Lord, grant us from among our wives and offspring comfort to our eyes and make us an example for the righteous. [Qur'an, Al-Furqan 25:74]

رَبِّ ٱجْعَلْنِى مُقِيمَ ٱلصَّلَوٰةِ وَمِن ذُرِّيَّتِى ۚ رَبَّنَا وَتَقَبَّلْ دُعَآءِ ﴿٤٠﴾ رَبَّنَا ٱغْفِرْ لِى وَلِوَٰلِدَىَّ وَلِلْمُؤْمِنِينَ يَوْمَ يَقُومُ ٱلْحِسَابُ ﴿٤١

My Lord, make me an establisher of prayer, and [many] from my descendants. Our Lord, and accept my supplication. (40) Our Lord, forgive me and my parents and the believers the Day the account is established." (41) [Qur'an, Ibrahim 14:40-41]

We pray that Allah grants us the du'a for “a pure progeny” that He granted Prophet Ibrahim, Prophet Zakariyya, and the mother of Maryam (upon them all be peace) in the Qur'an. We pray that we are able to be worthy teachers for our children who will carry this noble religion on, a precious trust to be handed from one generation to the next. May we not be “the weak link”.

Ameen.

Please don't forget us in your night prayers. Jazakallahu khairan.

And Allah knows best.
Wassallam