Wednesday, October 5, 2016

Take Care of Your Self First

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم
In the Name of Allah, Most Merciful, Most Compassionate

Assalaamu alaykum

While stereotypical egotistical behavior is never a good thing, there is one moment when your ego serves you well: it’s when you let it do what it does best...make you think of yourself first.

“Nafsi, nafsi,” whispered my soul, “Myself, myself!”

We have heard that ego is a bad thing. Most of us have been raised to think that we should always put others first. However, if you fail to care for your own deeds first, you can end up at the bottom levels of Hell, so to speak. By prioritizing yourself in matters of your Deen (Islam), you can take care of your own needs quite quickly and then tend to others’ needs.

Allah Almighty says,
يَـٰٓأَيُّهَا ٱلَّذِينَ ءَامَنُوا۟ قُوٓا۟ أَنفُسَكُمْ وَأَهْلِيكُمْ نَارًا وَقُودُهَا ٱلنَّاسُ وَٱلْحِجَارَةُ عَلَيْهَا مَلَـٰٓئِكَةٌ غِلَاظٌ شِدَادٌ لَّا يَعْصُونَ ٱللَّهَ مَآ أَمَرَهُمْ وَيَفْعَلُونَ مَا يُؤْمَرُونَ ﴿٦

O you who have believed, protect yourselves and your families from a Fire whose fuel is people and stones, over which are [appointed] angels, harsh and severe; they do not disobey Allah in what He commands them but do what they are commanded. (6)
[Qur'an, At-Tahrim 66:6]

Even in this ayah we learn that we need to save ourselves first and our loved ones come second.

On the Day of Judgment, all the people, including Prophet Adam until Prophet Isa (peace be upon them) will cry out saying the same word: “Nafsi nafsi – today I am concerned for only myself.”

Imagine the sound of billions of people around you all saying the same word "Myself, Myself". Who came out with you from the same grave? Now regarding your father and your mother– do you remember that day when your father died and how much you cried? When your mother died and how much you cried? When your sister died and how much you cried? When your brother died and how much you cried? When your spouse died and how much you cried? You wished, "If I could only see him/her again for one more day?" And now, on the Day of Resurrection, after thousands of years, and you see them again. Of course you will hug them and kiss them... or at least that is what you imagine. But no, this will not happen.

Allah Almighty says,
يَوْمَ يَفِرُّ الْمَرْءُ مِنْ أَخِيهِ ﴿٣٤﴾ وَأُمِّهِ وَأَبِيهِ ﴿٣٥﴾ وَصَاحِبَتِهِ وَبَنِيهِ ﴿٣٦﴾ لِكُلِّ امْرِئٍ مِّنْهُمْ يَوْمَئِذٍ شَأْنٌ يُغْنِيهِ ﴿٣٧

On that Day man shall run from his own brother, and from his mother and father, and from his wife and his children. Each one of them, on that Day, will have enough concern of his own to make him indifferent to the others.
[Qur'an Abasa 80:34]

Imagine yourself running away from your own father! From your own Mother, from your spouse, from your children, from your own brother or your sister! It has been a thousand years since the last time you saw them and you are running! Can you imagine yourself running from your mother, your children and your spouse? Everyone is running, but where to? No one knows where to. We are just running and saying the same word "myself, myself" again and again. "Myself–Myself". Imagine yourself running without an aim. You don't know where you are going, you are so afraid, and you're just running and running. You don't want to be tied down by anyone and you don't want anyone to stop you from running.

Maybe this picture scares you, but that Day is not all fearful, is not all horror. Now imagine the bright and beautiful side: A family coming out from their graves holding hands. Imagine with me– my father, my mother, my beloved family– all holding hands together. Why is that?

Allah Almighty says,
ٱلْأَخِلَّآءُ يَوْمَئِذٍۭ بَعْضُهُمْ لِبَعْضٍ عَدُوٌّ إِلَّا ٱلْمُتَّقِينَ ﴿٦٧﴾ يَـٰعِبَادِ لَا خَوْفٌ عَلَيْكُمُ ٱلْيَوْمَ وَلَآ أَنتُمْ تَحْزَنُونَ ﴿٦٨﴾ ٱلَّذِينَ ءَامَنُوا۟ بِـَٔايَـٰتِنَا وَكَانُوا۟ مُسْلِمِينَ ﴿٦٩﴾ ٱدْخُلُوا۟ ٱلْجَنَّةَ أَنتُمْ وَأَزْوَ‌ٰجُكُمْ تُحْبَرُونَ ﴿٧٠

Close friends, that Day, will be enemies to each other, except for the righteous (67) [To whom Allah will say], "O My servants, no fear will there be concerning you this Day, nor will you grieve, (68) [You] who believed in Our verses and were Muslims. (69) Enter Paradise, you and your kinds, delighted." (70)
[Qur'an, Az-Zukhruf]
So if a family was righteous in their life will they run away from each other? Of course not. So the verse: "That Day shall a man flee from his own brother, and from his mother and his father, and from his wife and his children." Who does it apply to? It applies to the disbeliever of Allah and the people who forgot about Allah in their lives.

For example, if two friends loved each other, and helped each other in obeying Allah in their life...on the resurrection day they are standing hand in hand. If two friends travel long distances every day in order to listen to learn the Deen, then the same thing is true for them.

Allah Almighty says,
مَنْ عَمِلَ صَـٰلِحًا مِّن ذَكَرٍ أَوْ أُنثَىٰ وَهُوَ مُؤْمِنٌ فَلَنُحْيِيَنَّهُۥ حَيَو‌ٰةً طَيِّبَةً ۖ وَلَنَجْزِيَنَّهُمْ أَجْرَهُم بِأَحْسَنِ مَا كَانُوا۟ يَعْمَلُونَ ﴿٩٧

Whoever does righteousness, whether male or female, while he is a believer - We will surely cause him to live a good life, and We will surely give them their reward [in the Hereafter] according to the best of what they used to do. (97)
[Qur'an, An-Nahl 16:97]

It's up to you. Which picture do you prefer? We are now all gathered on the same land. Imagine nowadays how life is becoming crowded with so many people. That is nothing compared to all the millions and billions standing together on Judgment Day. There are no trees for shade, no water to drink, and no rock to hide behind. Everything in our soul and heart is apparent...everything is obvious. Your cruel side appears, anything sinful you did in your life appears, if you have betrayed your spouse, your friends, your employer... it will all be clear.

Not only will bad things appear, good things will too. If you prayed, if you fasted, if you did anything good in your life, it will also appear. Take a moment now to think about it. What would you like to show on that day? If you can imagine that Day clearly, you will give up a lot of bad habits that will might regret on that Day. It all depends on what you choose to do in this life.

You should focus on your own needs by standing up for yourself – maybe even to yourself – especially if it means compromising something for the sake of Allah. You will always be presented with opportunities in life where you can practice selflessness and ignore the ego. You will have chances to put someone else first in terms of extending help and sacrificing for others; but don’t let anyone else overshadow you when it comes to your religion.

May Allah save us from the trials and tribulations of this life. May Allah resurrect us, our family and our loved ones with the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam and enter us, our family and our loved ones into the highest Paradise with him without reckoning. Ameen.

Allahumma salli 'ala Muhammad wa 'ala aalihi wa sahbihi wasallam.

And Allah knows best and is Most Wise, and He alone grants success, and to Him is the final return of all.

Wassalaam

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