In the Name of Allah, Most Merciful, Most Compassionate
Assalaamu alaykum
Dear Friends
I pray that you are well.
Our concern for our children is built into our Deen (the religion of Islam) and it is a very fundamental aspect of our Deen. Some of our children will be easy and some of our children will be a test. This is part of life and from the destiny of Allah. No two children are going to be the same. We have to work with all of them.
Even prophets had troubles with their children. We see in the family of Prophet Ya'qub alayhissalaam -- 2 of his children were wonderful -- Yusuf alayhissalaam and Benyamin, but most of them were not so wonderful. We don't believe that Prophet Ya'qub, a prophet of Allah, treated Yusuf better and he treated his other kids worse that they turned out the way they were because one thing all prophets do is to live by justice. But he was extremely patient and worked with them. In the end the bad kids repented and the family reunited. That is a great gift that Allah gave to Prophet Ya'qub and he was grateful. [story in Surah Yusuf]
We strive, we seek knowledge, we do our best, we make du'a, we forebear and exercise beautiful patience. How our children turn out to be is in the hands of Allah. If they turn out wonderful, that is the destiny of Allah and we thank Allah. If they turn out bad, that too is the destiny of Allah and we are patient. We don't despair.
Prophet Nuh alayhissalaam prayed for his son and asked Allah to save his son, but Allah drowned him. But how did Nuh responded?
قَالَ رَبِّ إِنِّىٓ أَعُوذُ بِكَ أَنْ أَسْـَٔلَكَ مَا لَيْسَ لِى بِهِۦ عِلْمٌ ۖ وَإِلَّا تَغْفِرْ لِى وَتَرْحَمْنِىٓ أَكُن مِّنَ ٱلْخَـٰسِرِينَ ﴿٤٧[Qur'an Hud 11:46]
[Noah] said, "My Lord, I seek refuge in You from asking that of which I have no knowledge. And unless You forgive me and have mercy upon me, I will be among the losers." (47)
Allah describes Prophet Nuh as being an extremely grateful servant. Gratitude is a trait in the Qur'an to which Allah describes the most exalted of people. The highest rank is a mark of perfection in man who are grateful.
رِّيَّةَ مَنْ حَمَلْنَا مَعَ نُوحٍ ۚ إِنَّهُۥ كَانَ عَبْدًا شَكُورًا ﴿٣[Qur'an, Al-Isra' 17:3]
O descendants of those We carried [in the ship] with Noah. Indeed, he was a grateful servant. (3)
The prophets were shepherds of their people. It was mentioned that the first profession of prophets was shepherding. Allah trained all prophets to be leaders by having them go through this line of work -- shepherding.
Narrated Abu Huraira, Allah be well pleased with him: The Prophet, Allah bless him and grant him peace, said, "Allah did not send any prophet but shepherded sheep." His companions asked him, "Did you do the same?" The Prophet, Allah bless him and grant him peace, replied, "Yes, I used to shepherd the sheep of the people of Mecca for some qirats." (Bukhari)
We are all shepherds in this life.
Ibn 'Umar reported that the Prophet, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, "All of you are shepherds and each of you is responsible for his flock. A man is the shepherd of the people of his house and he is responsible. A woman is the shepherd of the house of her husband and she is responsible. Each of you is a shepherd and each is responsible for his flock."
As shepherds, we can reach the highest rank with Allah. But we have to do our job here. We have to take this job of shepherding our flocks seriously and always be grateful with what Allah sent us -- good and bad.
We are compassionate and merciful to our flock and we exercise lots of forbearance and patience. We try our best to protect our flocks from the various dangers -- seen or unseen, wolves and other beasts, diseases, etc and we try our best to make sure that they get home safe.
The most important lesson from shepherding that the prophets learned is responsibility. A shepherd is accountable for his flock. A shepherd cannot go back to the owner and said, "I am sorry, I lost one sheep because that sheep happened to be stupid." It doesn't matter what the sheep do, you are responsible for anything that happened to the flock even if the sheep is wrong. The prophets are going to be accountable for their people one day, and we are going to be accountable for our family one day.
ا أَيُّهَا الَّذِينَ آمَنُوا قُوا أَنفُسَكُمْ وَأَهْلِيكُمْ نَارًا وَقُودُهَا النَّاسُ وَالْحِجَارَةُ عَلَيْهَا مَلَائِكَةٌ غِلَاظٌ شِدَادٌ لَّا يَعْصُونَ اللَّـهَ مَا أَمَرَهُمْ وَيَفْعَلُونَ مَا يُؤْمَرُونَ ﴿٦﴾ يَا أَيُّهَا الَّذِينَ كَفَرُوا لَا تَعْتَذِرُوا الْيَوْمَ ۖ إِنَّمَا تُجْزَوْنَ مَا كُنتُمْ تَعْمَلُونَ ﴿٧[Qur'an At-Tahrim 66:6-7]
O you who have believed, protect yourselves and your families from a Fire whose fuel is people and stones, over which are [appointed] angels, harsh and severe; they do not disobey Allah in what He commands them but do what they are commanded. (6) O you who have disbelieved, make no excuses that Day. You will only be recompensed for what you used to do. (7)
Shepherding also teaches the prophets patience. Taking out sheep to graze requires a lot of patience. Sheep take their time, they are slow, but you have to wait. You have to be patient. They might end up fighting with each other or they might end up playing but you have to be patient. You have to wait. You can't really tell them "finish up, we have to leave." They are going to take their time and you have to sit there waiting. That's why sometimes you see a painting of a shepherd sitting on a rock looking at his sheep grazing. Shepherds wait until their sheep have their fill. They do this day in and day out, leave in the morning and come back at sunset. You have to be patient and have to bear with them, whether they are communicating well with you or not, you still have to be patient.
Prophet Musa alayhissalaam was very patient with Bani Israel. It was an unbearable task to deal with them but Musa alayhissalaam had a training in shepherding longer than any prophets. He was a shepherd for 10 years. He went through a lot but he was patient. Prophet Nuh alayhissalaam went through 950 years in da'wah. He tried every different ways to get his people to believe in the One God--publicly and privately, at night and daytime, but they rejected the message. They were very bad to him, ridiculed him, etc. Imagine doing the same thing, meeting the same people who turned you down for 950 years! Patience.
One of the wisdoms behind having the prophets as shepherd before prophethood so that they may become skilled in herding the flock as they will be responsible for their respective nations in the future. In herding one attains forbearance and mercy and imbues patience for when the shepherd is obliged to gather his flock and herded from one area to another at once knowing the traits of all, and all the while protecting the flock from predators, he has thus attained the skills necessary to lead the nation and protect it from enemies both from within and abroad. They learn patience and attain the understanding of the different nature of people. They learn to show kindness to the weak and resolve with the dominant, the reasons for which Allah chose the sheep for the prophets as opposed to communal animals (such as cows or camels) because they are animals that are weak and need extra guidance and attention. Sheep are more difficult to maintain as a flock because of their propensity to go astray and wander away. This is akin to human society and it is the Divine wisdom of Allah to train the prophets this way. The Prophet, Allah bless him and grant him peace, mentioning this humble trait shared by all prophets attesting to his humility to Allah. [ibn Hajar[
رَبَّنَا هَبْ لَنَا مِنْ أَزْوَٰجِنَا وَذُرِّيَّـٰتِنَا قُرَّةَ أَعْيُنٍ وَٱجْعَلْنَا لِلْمُتَّقِينَ إِمَامًا
Our Lord, grant us from among our wives and offspring comfort to our eyes and make us an example for the righteous.
May Allah grant us success.
وَمَا تَوْفِيقِىٓ إِلَّا بِٱللَّـهِ ۚ عَلَيْهِ تَوَكَّلْتُ وَإِلَيْهِ أُنِيبُ
And my success is not but through Allah. Upon him I have relied, and to Him I turn (repentant). [Qur'an Hud 11:88]
Ameen.
Please don't forget us in your night prayers. Jazakum Allahu khairan.
And Allah knows best.
Wassalaam
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